Posted on 05/13/2005 7:36:25 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
It looks like William Rivers (Pied Piper) Pitt is doing a lot of worrying that the scam perpetrated by Andy Stephenson is going to explode in his face. Pity Poor Pathetic Pied Piper Pitt (had to get in at least one allitertation) for he hasn’t slept since April as you can see in this Pitt authored DUmmie THREAD titled, “I could use a little help here.” Yeah, Pitt, you could actually use a LOT of help WHEN the AndyScam blows up in such a way that even the incredibly gullible DUmmies realize that Andy Stephenson has been scamming them just as cold-bloodedly as his former mentor, Bev Harris. A constant theme right now in DUmmieland is that they just KNOW that Andy is on the up and up BECAUSE Pied Piper Pitt told them so. I hate to tell you this DUmmies but Pied Piper Pitt has ALSO been having doubts about the DUmmies as have been documented in the Free Republic discussion forum of the previous DUFU edition titled, “’About the Andy Stephenson situation’---Skinner.” Oh, and speaking of Skinner, haven’t the DUmmies noticed that he has been MIA since issuing his doubts about Stephenson a few days ago? Skinner is less than an hour from Baltimore but he has yet to make the short trip over there to verify Andy’s fraudulent story. It is “The Silence of the Scams.” So let us now join Pied Piper Pitt in his state of complete sleeplessness. Somehow I think Pitt will be greeting the sun for many, many mornings to come. As usual the insomniac rantings of Pitt and his DUmmie followers are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who enjoyed a refreshing night of deep sleep, is in the [brackets]:
I could use a little help here
[You sure do, Pied Piper Pitt, especially after the DUmmies form a lynch mob to go after you when even those dopes realize FOR SURE that they have been scammed by Andy Stephenson, thanks in large part to you vouching for Andy’s honesty.]
I haven't been able to sleep for about two weeks. I start to drop off, and maybe actually sleep for about 20 minutes, before popping awake. Last night, for about the fifteenth day in a row, I saw the sun come up against my will. This has started to affect my stomach, which makes sleeping harder. I have tried exercise to wear myself out, and have managed to badly strain a muscle in my back.
[Your back will hurt even more after the DUmmies start angrily beating on it while cursing you for enabling the AndyScam.]
So, to recap: No sleep since April, rotten stomach, torn up back. I've reached that insomnia point where I am psyching myself out; I got no sleep the night before last, spent yesterday writing a PDA action alert and a 30-minute speech transcript, drove two hours to do the speech, gave the speech, did a three-hour Q&A, talked to people for another hour, drove two more hours to get home, and by the time I got back here I was literally quivering with exhaustion.
[So, to recap: You are worried sick about what will happen to you after Andy Stephenson is proven to be a complete FRAUD even to the satisfaction of the incredibly gullible DUmmie suckers.]
But I laid awake until 6:37am (I remember looking at the clock), popped awake an 8, 9, 10 before finally giving up and getting up at 11. I can barely see straight right now, my stomach feels like it has snakes in it, my back is killing me so I can't exercise...and I know for a stone fact that I won't be able to sleep again. Tried a nap an hour or so ago. Came thiiiiiiiis close to dropping of and then popped awake.
[3:11 AM: “Worried sick about the backlash when Andy’s scam is finally proven.”
3:12 AM: “Will they toss me out of Dummieland?”
3:13 AM: “Will my speaking engagements be cancelled?”
3:14 AM: “Maybe I could change my identity.”
3:15 AM: “DAMN YOU TO HELL, Andy, for suckering me into being your lousy cheerleader!!!”
3:16 AM: “Is it 3:17 AM yet?”]
Any ideas? I've already heard about taking mela-whatever, but that stuff gave my mother splitting headaches when she tried it. I have drastically cut back on caffiene. Any other suggestions would be appreciated. I've reached that violently, violently, violently frustrated stage of insomnia where sleep is a guaranteed impossibility, and if a routine like yesterday's (while on no sleep) can't get it done, I am at a total loss.
[Confession is good for the soul. And now let us read the hilarious advice on insomnia cures from your fellow DUmmies, Pitt.]
scotch. start about 3pm. you'll be out by 9
[Thunderbird. Start about 3 PM. You’ll be homeless by 9.]
Tried it. I managed to make myself unconscious, but that isn't sleep. Woke up worse off the next day. Tried it again a few days later, and all that happened was I was drunk and wide awake.
[Pied Piper Pitt---The wide awake drunk. That’s what happens when you fall such obvious scams that Andy perpetrates.]
sex?
[Unfortunately Andy can no longer be located.]
Move the clock...for one thing. Looking at that thing with the blinking : all night can be horrifying.
[If Pitt moves his clock all it will mean is that he will have to keep walking over to it every 5 minutes to check to see if he got at least a half hour of sleep.]
yes, sex works remember, only in fundie land is a monogamous partner of the opposite gender who desires to become pregnant is a requirement for "sex."
[Only in DUmmieland does it not matter what gender or species your sex partner is.]
Will: see a doctor. Insomnia is a bitch, although I only get it maybe once or twice a month.
[Pitt needs to see a shrink doctor. See Pitt lying on the shrink’s couch? Let us see what the shrink is writing on his note pad: “Just plain NUTS!!!”]
This sounds like a case for sleeping pills though I ordinarily wouldn't recommend them.
[NOT a good idea. Pitt would be tempted to swallow the whole bottle after the AndyScam blows up in DUmmieland.]
Benadryl. But don't take it every night, as you can become addicted (as per my physician husband).
[Methinks Pitt would become addicted the first night after desperately popping pill after pill of those Benny’s.]
Eat lots of turkey! Turkey has natural sleep inducers in it.
[And if that doesn’t work, have someone take a frozen turkey and slam it on Pitt’s head to knock him out.]
My problem is that I have bad physical reactions to anti-histamine stuff. I had raging bad allergies as a kid, and was always loaded up on the stuff. After a few years it just messed me up, and still does whenever I touch it.
[I can sympathize, Pitt. I’m allergic to wool so I’ve had to cross sheep off my date list. Such are the sacrifices I’ve had to make.]
Tonight I will do turkey, warm milk and the tub
[You’re going to do turkey in a tub filled with warm milk, Pitt? You really ARE kinky!]
Yes - I like Tylenol PM myself.
[I once tried to commit suicide by taking a cyanide pill. Unfortunately some sick bastard tampered with the cyanide pill bottle and I took a Tylenol that he inserted instead. I’m suing!!!]
empty your mind, grasshopper...
[…be just like your fellow DUmmies, cricket…]
I don't really know any tricks to get to sleep but one thing I discovered is that it makes no sense to just lay there willing yourself to do it - the more you try, the less likely it is that it will happen. So when I couldn't sleep, I'd get up. I'd tidy the house, I'd do laundry, I'd go for a walk, I'd read, I'd write, I'd work. Eventually, I'd get very, very tired and I'd lay down again. If I didn't get to sleep within a reasonable time, I'd get up again.
[Good idea… Hey Pitt! My pad needs cleaning and after that you can do my laundry.]
stop doing crystal meth that's what I had to do.
[speed_addiction…is that you?]
The back thing is my own fault. I've been beating the shit out of myself on my weight bench, way overdoing it to try and get sleepy. A muscle in my shoulderblade area finally got tired of it and told me to f*ck myself.
[And after the AndyScam scandal explodes, Pitt, your fellow DUmmies will be telling you the same thing as your shoulderblade muscle told you.]
Definitely see a doctor...there might be a physiological reason you're having trouble sleeping.
[Pitt’s problem is ALL mental.]
Will, I'm not a doctor, but I am going to go ahead and give you medical advice anyway. Your body is telling you to take a break.
[Yes, good advice. Take a break, Pitt, on a Costa Rica getaway with Andy Stephenson. Don’t worry about expenses. Andy has $50,000 to blow.]
Otherwise, until you see an internist, a bit of turkey, milk and a warm bath. Then find something boring, yet educational, to read.
[Maybe not educational but Pitt’s own writings should do the trick.]
A friend of mine who went through a divorce said she would drop her jaw down as you would right before you fall asleep and then force herself to COUNT SHEEP. It actually worked for her.
[It won’t work for me. I told you before that I’m allergic to wool.]
One word solution... PAMPER!
[One word solution… PAMPERS!]
White noise (I have a CD of very, very faint/distand thunderstorms and rain, and it's coma-inducing).
[White noise (I have a CD of very, very faint Pitt speeches, and it’s coma-inducing).]
Breathe thru your eyes ... Bull Durham
[Breath thru your butt … Andy Stephenson.]
Watch some mindless TV.
[Keith Olbermann.]
Ambien is habit forming and every person is different. So telling someone to ignore legitimate and documented side effects and product warnings is not particularly sound advice, wouldn't you agree?
[WARNING: Side effects of Ambien may inlude nausea, diarrhea attacks, dizziness, urges to support left wing loony causes, and the total loss of any ability to discern obvious scams.]
dude...seriously...smoke up. If I need to be asleep, pot is my friend to a nice, happy, and deep sleep.
[“Puff the magic dragon down by the sea!”]
First of all, sleep is over-rated.
[Sleep? Who needs it!]
You need to start "shutting down" very gradually.
[After the DUmmies finally wake up to the AndyScam, they will be “shutting down” Pitt very rapidly.]
Try to figure out what caused this abnormal sleep cycle to begin in the first place and address that issue.
[I don’t believe that Pitt thinking about how he has become Andy Stephenson’s lead cheerleader in Dummieland is going to help him get any sleep.]
Go To An Acupuncturist ASAP.
[Perhaps the acupuncturist can anesthetize those brain cells containing all memories about Andy.]
want something natural? try acupuncture- & I know where to get it cheap in the south end
[I don’t know about Pitt but Andy certainly would love to be acupunctured in the south end.]
You really should go to a doctor for a sleep evaluation. This may include keeping a diary for a week or so…
[May 13: “WHAT? WHAT? WHAT will I do when the DUmmies rise up against me when the AndyScam breaks?
May 15: “Need to leave the country. PRONTO!”
May 16: “Quick flight down to Costa Rica.”
May 20: “Slight gender preference modification but the honeymoon with Andy is just dreamy!”]
Cancel your appointments. Don't listen to TV or radio. Turn off your cell phone. Rent some funny movies.
[Flim Flam Man. The Sting.]
Well, I'm a little bit concerned about how long it will take this story to play out, how long it will take before the DUmmies understand the true nature of their cult-hero, because over Memorial Day weekend, I'm involved in the "Norwegian Days Festival" in Newman Grove, Nebraska.
Alas, the poor Norwegians; in a state of 1.6 million people, there are only 600 of them (as compared with about 750,000 Danes and 10,000 Swedes)--but bravely, the festival must go on, and I am going to be doing my best to help make it bigger than it had been.
So I hope this is all over by that weekend; I do not like divided loyalties. One thing at a time.
I don't suppose there is any 'time-stamp' on his 'diagnosis' sheets for that day, is there?
Yeah. Badly.
Uh, the Grand DUmmie "Skinner" is still not exercising responsibility--he is just letting things go on and on, getting more and more out of control, without lifting a finger to say "stop!"
DUmmieland is reasonably quiet right now, but based upon past history, that generally means some sort of haemerrhoidal eruption is about to occur (when, only God knows, but soon).
You know, even though I destest and loathe and despise his politics, I used to have some respect for the Grand DUmmie "Skinner;" after all, it cannot be easy, being the warden of an insane asylum.
But that respect has been eroding, evaporating.
I think what the Grand DUmmie "Skinner" needs to do are three: (a) never leave the 2nd Assistant Grand DUmmie "EarlG" alone in the office; (b) institute, immediately, a policy of no fund-solicitations in DUmmieland; and (c) expel the felonious Andy and his infatuated accomplice, the DUmmie "sfexpat2000" from the premises forever.
But the Grand DUmmie "Skinner" pays no attention to my whispered hints and warnings--when undercover there, sometimes I am so close to the Grand DUmmie "Skinner" I can even scent his cologne.
creeping me out!!! lol...
I bet that Norwegian festival will also be great fun! Please make sure to take pictures of the traditional festivities for us on the Norwegian ping list!
Heh, something I also hope to get back to soon, a bit of normalcy with my other ping lists that I have neglected checking up on due to this!
Well, there's the Clarkies, the Deaniacs, the Kerry Cult, the Kucinich Peace Brigades, the run of the mill Clintonistas (now known as the Rodhamites), the Red Chomskys, the Boxer Coven, and even a very small contingent of Al Gore's Thorazine Army.
It depends. Under the banking regs, they can only hold the funds of your deposited checks for certain time limits. For example, an out of state check-- 5 days (with release of the first $100 immediately), international checks 10 days, local checks (or payroll checks) might be released same day. I've been out of the industry for a while so I'm hazy on the exact times.
And all of these "regs" can be overridden by a manager/ supervisor (you cannot EXTEND the hold, but you can waive the hold). Why or when would a manager do this? If the customer has had an account for a long time, or if they have a large balance in another account that the checks can be held against-- or the manager is in a good move that day & decides to give the customer a break. It's quite subjective (the bank is regulated from being able to derive the benefit of USING your money without allowing you access to it, which is why the feds place the limit on how long the funds can be held-- but waiving the hold is at the discretion of the bank).
And to correct some other misinformation that might be out there, you can stop pay (specifically, file an indemnity bond-- they don't call it "stop payment") on a cashier's check-- by claiming it was lost or stolen or destroyed. My old bank probably reissued/ refunded cashier's checks dozens of times a year-- usually in the case where the payee was wrong, or the amount was wrong (happens a lot in loan closings, for example) or it was lost/ destroyed.However, in the case of a cashier's check that they're requesting the bank not pay, they'd have to wait something like 90 days before they would get their funds back (because the bank would want to cover themselves and insure it did not clear). UCC 3-312 covers some of these issues.
In other words, it's conceivable that Undie (or whomever bought the checks) could simply return the cashier's checks to the issuing bank & say "oh, we didn't need these after all" and get their money back.
"Though, does it say if Undie himself got the puppy, or was said puppy from a friend in WA? I believe that came up at CU?
I don't suppose there is any 'time-stamp' on his 'diagnosis' sheets for that day, is there?"
The puppy issue, I don't know. I can't get into the archives of the DUng pit right now (hmm, didn't someone suggest the shredders were working overtime?).
As for the timestamp, I was actually wondering the same thing myself earlier in the day, when someone here posted recent Undie comments. In the big thread, the posting of the diagnosis images just comes up as blue boxes with X's for me.
I'm late to the game here and trying to catch up.
I do have to laugh when they ask for a new thread to make their dialup posters happy...they still don't have a clue that they are their own worst enemy!
Dnag it, I mistitled the felonious Andy.
Do you know where he lives? I swear he looks so familiar-- in a really creepy way.
Aww, man, you don't like the bouncing, happy smiley's? Those are my favorite. LOL.
I don't know where the 2nd Assistant Grand DUmmie "EarlG" lives--I never paid as much attention to him, or the Assistant Grand DUmmie "Elad" until, well, this past week.
The Grand DUmmie "Skinner" lives, or lived, in the Washington, D.C. area--he was a summer intern or something, in the mailroom of a congressman.
Date: Sun, 02 Jan 2005 01:04:51 -0800
Hi DU Panic Room Members,
If you are interested in donating to the Andy Stephenson fund
raiser,
her is how you can:
go to h*tp://www.paypal.com[1]
If you do not currently have a Paypal account, you will first
need to create one.
Once your account is established, simply click on "Send Money"
Andy's email account is:
Andy_Stephenson@comcast
Whatever you can spare until our friend is back on his feet
will be greatly appreciated by Andy, of this I am certain.
He is a good person and needs our help, so please contribute if you
can.
BeHereNow
Here is evidence of fund raising from January in an email from cu. Been at it for quite awhile.
Why do you think he would do that??
BTW... members here have the images saved. Nice try!
What was his problem then??
Uh-huh, and in case the felonious Andy is reading this, he had better hurry up and pay his past-due "comcast" bill, because otherwise that spigot of $$$$ is going to be shut off.
I suggest "comcast" take cash only; no checks or "cashiers" checks, from the felonious Andy.
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