Posted on 07/13/2022 4:03:23 PM PDT by nickcarraway
Yes because family law in America is MASSIVELY sexist against men. Judges routinely screw men over in horribly unjust ways like what you describe. eg "oh you've been betrayed in the worst way possible? Too bad! Now you're stuck being a cuck and you will be saddled with the burden of raising this kid that is not yours. Nothing you can do about it. ha ha ha ha" As for any adoption agency, that child does have a mother. The mother should certainly raise him - and his real father needs to be found and forced to take on the responsibility of caring for the child he created.
I’ve read about adults who’ve found out through DNA sites like Ancestry that the person they though was their father is not, and that they have half siblings from their real father, etc.
These adults now have children and grandchildren. The real question is whether to tell them the truth or not about their heritage. What a nightmare.
To take this position you assume that after five years of rearing, loving, caring, nurturing, teaching, etc. that a person could just- click- totally betray the little boy no matter what the circumstances of his creation were- the father’s beef with the mother is not related to the father being a father- that little boy is still his son in every way but genetics- the father could have adopted him and together they could have had a great life.
You keep talking about the dad being a cuck if he kept his son- that’s your view
I’d say he’s a godly man and hero for being Christ like and staying true to the relationship he was building with the child. I like my version better than yours.
A version like yours won the day but it was not the best for either of them- in my version the father is a heroe not an abandoner of a precious little boy.
You see it as betraying the kid. I don’t. The betrayal was when the wife cheated with another man then used this poor guy by telling him it was his kid. The mother and her f*** buddy the real father are the ones you need to blame for betrayal. The husband is not the father.
Not.
The husband could have adopted him but he’s under no obligation legal or moral to do so. That child has a father. Where is he? He needs to come take responsibility.
You say it’s my view the husband would be a cuck to accept this. That’s not just my view. Those are the facts. The wife cheated. That’s another man’s child.
You say it was not the best for either of them. It’s a horrible situation but the husband may well feel that what’s best for him is to move on with his life and maybe start a family of his own. Who is anyone else to judge him in the awful situation he was put in by his wife’s betrayal? He didn’t abandon the child according to Chinese law. It was never his.
The child is suffering and people here make jokes. Disgusting.
Many, many women have gotten hosed, and badly, under so-called "no fault" laws. It's also the children who suffer. Maximum profit for the lawyers lies in making the couple fight over everything.
The original, conservative intent of the law (that all children born during the marriage belong to the married parents regardless of paternity) was to keep children and abandoned spouses off welfare wherever possible, so that the taxpayer is not saddled with someone else's children.
As the country has move closer to socialism, and more women are able to work outside the home, that law as been successfully challenged from time to time due to the other more recent innovation, DNA testing. Conversely, some men who discover it is another man's child and wish to divorce do not want to be denied custody of a child they have loved and raised, and will fight to remain the legal father.
Unless the couple are very wealthy, China doesn't provide women as many opportunities for slutty behavior as in the Western nations. That's why I'm leaning toward that she may have been raped, or some other more reasonable explanation, such as dating two men before marriage and receiving a promise from the one who became her husband not to ¡care! if it were someone else's child, since women are greatly outnumbered by men in China and heterosexual marriage is a scarce commodity. Then after the normal grind of family life started to get to him, he got a DNA test and broke his promise. Anything is possible without the facts.
If he loved the son as Christianity influenced American people would expect of him then he would not have abandoned the boy. This is China and not a Christian nation and no doubt this a morally darkened man as was the boy’s mother who is also unsaved.
Even a morally righteous man is going to have issues in the aftermath of such a discovery. A huge work of the Spirit would be needed inside such a man to not allow the anger and hurt that the man may feel towards the woman to spill onto the child. Such a man is going to have to come to the realization that perhaps the Lord wanted this child with this “other dad but not his dad”. That some may falter and run away from that responsibility in some fashion or other might make them “monsters” in some folks’ minds. But I understand that some won’t be able to handle the truth of it.
Are you a father to a son by any chance?
I prefer not to make this personal to the posters.
Fair enough. But every FR male can wonder if he’d expect his father to disown him under such circumstances.
can’t he equally wonder if he would be saddled with raising another man’s child and/or if it would be remotely fair for courts to impose that burden on him?
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