"By further reflecting that the clearest evidence would be requisite to make any sane man believe in the miracles by which Christianity is supported,—and that the more we know of the fixed laws of nature the more incredible do miracles become,—that the men at that time were ignorant and credulous to a degree almost incomprehensible by us,—that the Gospels cannot be proven to have been written simultaneously with the events,—that they differ in many important details, far too important, as it seemed to me to be admitted as the usual inaccuracies of eye witnesses;—by such reflections as these, which I give not as having the least novelty or value, but as they influenced me, I gradually came to disbelieve in Christianity as a divine revelation. The fact that many fake religions have spread over large portions of the earth like wildfire had some weight with me. But I was very unwilling to give up my belief; I feel sure of this, for I can remember often and often inventing day-dreams of old letters between distinguished Romans, and manuscripts being discovered at Pompeii or elsewhere, which confirmed in the most striking manner all that was written in the Gospels. But I found it more and more difficult, with free scope given to my imagination, to invent evidence which would suffice to convince me. Thus disbelief crept over me at a very slow rate, but was at last complete. The rate was so slow that I felt no distress, and have never since doubted even for a single second that my conclusion was correct."
( Charles Darwin in his Autobiography of Charles Darwin, Dover Publications, 1992, p. 62. )
Charles Darwin (1809-1882)
"I think that generally (& more & more as I grow older), but not always, that an agnostic would be the most correct description of my state of mind."
( Quoted from Adrian Desmond and James Moore, Darwin: The Life of a Tormented Evolutionist, New York: W. W. Norton & Company, 1991, p. 636. )
Hate to break your bubble:
The "Lady Hope Story", published in 1915, claimed that Darwin had converted to Christianity on his sickbed. The claims were refuted by Darwin's children and have been dismissed as false by historians.[120] His daughter, Henrietta, who was at his deathbed, said that he did not convert to Christianity.[121] His last words were, in fact, directed at Emma: "Remember what a good wife you have been."[122]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Darwin
Though Charles Darwin's family background was Nonconformist, and his father, grandfather and brother were Freethinkers,[109] at first he did not doubt the literal truth of the Bible.[110] He attended a Church of England school, then at Cambridge studied Anglican theology to become a clergyman.[111] He was convinced by William Paley's teleological argument that design in nature proved the existence of God,[112] but during the Beagle voyage he questioned, for example, why beautiful deep-ocean creatures had been created where no one could see them, or how the ichneumon wasp paralysing caterpillars as live food for its eggs could be reconciled with Paley's vision of beneficent design.[113] He was still quite orthodox and would quote the Bible as an authority on morality, but did not trust the history in the Old Testament.[114] When investigating transmutation of species he knew that his naturalist friends thought this a bestial heresy undermining miraculous justifications for the social order, the kind of radical argument then being used by Dissenters and atheists to attack the Church of England's privileged position as the established church.[115] Though Darwin even wrote of religion as a tribal survival strategy, he still believed that God was the ultimate lawgiver.[116] His belief dwindled, and with the death of his daughter Annie in 1851 Darwin finally lost all faith in Christianity. He continued to help the local church with parish work, but on Sundays would go for a walk while his family attended church.[117] He now thought it better to look at pain and suffering as the result of general laws rather than direct intervention by God.[118] When asked about his religious views, he wrote that he had never been an atheist in the sense of denying the existence of a God, and that generally "an Agnostic would be the more correct description of my state of mind."[119] The "Lady Hope Story", published in 1915, claimed that Darwin had converted to Christianity on his sickbed. The claims were refuted by Darwin's children and have been dismissed as false by historians.[120] His daughter, Henrietta, who was at his deathbed, said that he did not convert to Christianity.[121] His last words were, in fact, directed at Emma: "Remember what a good wife you have been."[122]