What is your fascination with speaking spanish and tortillas? This is starting to sound like one of those Shakespeare plays where the woman just keeps washing her hands over and over and over and over an...
A good therapist might be in order. I'll even chip in a few bucks to pay for your first hour.
I'm sure you could refer many therapist names. Seems you have a lot of experience in such endeavors.
Borders-language-culture, baby.