Regards, Ivan
Posted on 12/29/2002 5:16:30 PM PST by MadIvan
Marriage is more damaging to a woman's well-being than a man's because it offers her fewer immediate personal benefits, says research by a Government-funded group.
The One Plus One Marriage and Partnership Research organisation said that while married men appeared physically better off than single men, the same could not be said for married women.
Furthermore, single men were more likely to regard themselves as unhappy compared to married men. The same was not generally true of single women.
Research among more than 2,000 divorced couples found that women had to make a greater adjustment to marriage than men.
"The greater part of the husband's day will continue to be spent much as it was before his marriage, whereas this is rarely so for the wife," said Penny Mansfield, director of One Plus One.
"If she continues to work, she is likely to have to combine the job of housewife with that of full-time worker. This in itself may be a source of stress because she will have less opportunity for relaxation.
"Even if the wife does not work following marriage, there may be adjustment difficulties for her since she has to learn to adopt a completely different lifestyle.
"The absence of colleagues, workmates and the loss of an independent income will require varying degrees of adaptation which may all contribute to a sense of increasing isolation."
Half of those surveyed reported difficulties of sexual adjustment, particularly after the birth of a baby, while about the same (48 per cent) spoke of adjustment difficulties connected with housing and finance.
Most (73 per cent) said the problems which led to marital failure started within the first five years but for a third they surfaced within the first 12 months. The duration of marital "happiness" among the couples, whose marriages lasted an average of 10-14 years, was only 3.87 years.
The Government is spending millions of pounds on research into why marriages fail and what can be done to help couples stay together.
Family campaigners blame marital breakdown on Labour policies which have stripped away the tax benefits and most of the legal privileges that go with staying married.
In August the Lord Chancellor's department acknowledged that the number of couples who divorced rose for the first time in almost a decade. There were 860 more decrees absolute - the legal measure that finalises divorce - last year than in 2000, making a total of 137,270 completed divorces.
The organisation pointed to American research which showed that couples who did manage to stay married allowed each spouse to retain some sense of autonomy.
That meant being careful about what was argued about and accepting compromises. The basic components of long-lasting marriages were love, trust and respect.
I'll take a stab at this :>
They get fixed up by their married friends.
A strict "NO" rule from me. I will not let my married (or unmarried) friends fix me up. I'd rather pick my own.
They get invited to parties and gatherings by their married friends who feel sorry for them.
All my married friends tell me I'm SMART for not getting married! None of them feel sorry for me! Not one!
They go on vacation with single girlfriends.
Boooorriiiing!!!
They buy things guys want to buy, like RVs and jet skis.
Got me there, bought a jet ski with my first paycheck after college. Best toy I ever had! And the boyfriends thought it cool.
They buy birthday presents for other peoples kids and grandkids.
Nope. Those kids are spoiled enough. Besides, I can't remember all those birthdays, lol.
They become very close with their pets.
Okay, so my dog hangs out with me on errands. And road trips. She's a cool dog, and has been on my jet ski.
They get a little weird.
ooops, I think you got me there with my last statement, lol! ;o>
I am just sick of James Bond. Especially because we also have most of the movies on video!!
Other than this, he is a pretty swell guy. But I am really, really sick of Roger Moore.
Regards, Ivan
And the single man won't likewise have to do housework, cook his own meals, wash his own clothes and on and on so on and so forth?
Idiots.
You should demand your tax money back Ivan. RIGHT NOW!
They hate us for it, and hope we catch their disease.
Yes, they did. But Curly was quite the womanizer in real life. Who woulda thunk?
You're a bit of a cynic. Yes, lust is a reason lots of 20-somethings get married. Then, some years down the road, after the sex becomes a twice-a-month thing, they realize they really do love each other, and kids and all kinds of other stuff test that love.
Love's a journey, pal, not something that happens and then you put it on cruise control.
I had a chance to be a Catholic priest some 27 years ago, and I chose to love a woman instead. And, not just any woman, but THIS WOMAN, that I'm still married to.
It was, by far, the right path.
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