Dubya ships troops to a Pacific island nation to handle a prob. (We talking Philippines?) ... Iraq backs off (probably after coaching by their Prime Hollywood Minister Saddam Penn) and the U.S. gets a new Mideast ally ... The economy perks a little. By June people are cautious but more confident ... Jennifer Lopez. Pregnant WITH TWINS?! After that, pregnant again. (Ben Affleck should only have the strength.) ... Halle Berry. Files for divorce. Nails a tall, white and handsome beau. Creates a clothing and jewelry line. (As does every single living semi-breathing celebrity alive.) ... Water-main break near Macy's ... Kirk Douglas gets some special award someplace and makes a film with fellow oldies ... Liza tries a talk show. Liza starts a children's charity.
John Cohan's done predictions for me each year since 1987. Here's his 15th set: Robert Blake home with baby Rosie. His case takes unexpected twist when a lesbian link to Bonny Lee Bakley proves to be solution to this murder ... Whoopi Goldberg marries again. He's young, Jewish (maybe really named Goldberg?) and not in showbiz ... Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. fight demons in their marriage ... George Clooney does the "Clark Gable" vehicle and his already high stardom goes higher ... Chelsea Clinton weds. Baby cuts short career ... Britney Spears marries nice young man. Gets nice big movie shot ... Sean Connery gets large money for a one-shot movie as an older James Bond. Cindy Adams
BEN STILLER's resolution: "Eat less M&Ms." ... Martha Stewart: "Get married." [????] Poetic Tommy Lee: "Have a better year. This one was bumpy-ass
s - - -." Daniel Baldwin: "Stay sober." Rosie O'Donnell told Allure mag she wants "to eat food with nutritional value along with the crap I normally eat." [Great, now there won't be any food left for the rest of us.] Cindy Adams
What career? Society flake and professional moocher?