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Prayer Warriors Needed - FReeper desperate
myself | 11/12/02 | Genesis defender

Posted on 11/12/2002 4:36:35 PM PST by Genesis defender

This is my first article posting, so I hope I do this right.

I am desperate. My world as I know it is falling apart. Last Thursday morning my wife told me I have until January 1st to move out. She is kicking me out because of many things, but I will list as many as I can recall.

She has good reason to give me the boot. We have been married for five and a half years, and before we were married I promised her that I would take care of her and support the family so she could stay home. Unfortunately, I have a huge problem with following through on my promises.

For five years I have made similar promises of getting a job, looking for a job, and just doing chores around the house. I tried for a time, but eventually slid back to my typical behavior of procrastinating. I have held various jobs throughout this time, but none were well-paying enough to support a family.

To make things worse, I had an addiction that prevented me from doing constructive things with my time. Please don't laugh when I tell you what I was addicted to. It was video games. I would play at times six to eight hours a day during periods of unemployment.

Two Saturdays ago, my wife first told me she had been thinking of kicking me out, and at that point I did something I should have done years ago. I asked her to come into our computer room, collected all of my computer game CDs (close to 30 in all), and I broke all of them.

I thought that had been enough for the time to prevent me getting kicked out. But I was wrong.

Complicating things is the fact that we have a two and a half year-old son together. I love that little boy a whole bunch, but I haven't provided properly for either him or his mommy like a husband and man should.

I have been an awful human being towards my wife. I have had her hopes up, then dashed so many times. She has told me she likes me as a friend and our son's father, but she says she no longer loves me as a husband.

She has also told me she doesn't know what she wants me to do that would make her love me again.

We are separating, not divorcing (for now). She told me the ONLY reason she has not divorced me is because she is a Christian.

So I am asking for two prayer requests:
First, that the Lord will heal my crumbling marriage by fundamentally changing my habits and healing my wife's broken heart. I have frantically been trying to change, but I want this time to be permanent.
Second, that God would help me find a job to support myself by Jan 1st. I so desperately want to prove to my wife that I can support myself and be a Godly man for once in my life.


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To: John Jamieson
Next thing you know, he's going to be addicted to this forum.
61 posted on 11/12/2002 5:16:02 PM PST by Cagey
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To: Cagey
"Next thing you know, he's going to be addicted to this forum"


Like that happens..sheesh.
62 posted on 11/12/2002 5:17:03 PM PST by Registered
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To: Cagey
Just a different kind of game.
63 posted on 11/12/2002 5:17:37 PM PST by John Jamieson
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To: Genesis defender
To make things worse, I had an addiction that prevented me from doing constructive things with my time. Please don't laugh when I tell you what I was addicted to. It was video games. I would play at times six to eight hours a day during periods of unemployment.

Well, there are some here who are addicted to posting at FR. It is fundamentally no different than your addiction to vidoe games. I myself spend too much time here, but I won't allow it to interefere with my business.

If you are not too old, have you considered military service? Six to eight weeks at boot camp will help break that addiction, and you will follow it up with another eight weeks to a year (or more) of advanced training. Military service will help provide you with discipline and structure that you apparently lack. There are some great skills you can acquire and occupational areas that will translate into good paying jobs in the civilian sector. Just be careful choosing what you go into.

Just one idea. It might not be appropriate in your case. Good luck.

64 posted on 11/12/2002 5:18:16 PM PST by Kevin Curry
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To: Genesis defender
Brother, get in your prayer closet and humble yourself before God. He knows what you have need of. He knows why you're behaving the way you are. He will do a healing in you if you allow Him. But it will take a goodly amount of prayer and time in His word.

If you have a pastor you trust, go to him. Acquaint yourself with people who were in situations like this and learn how God helped them pull themselves out of the mire.

Remember that it's satan who wants to condemn you and any voice that does so is echoing him. God will always encourage and lift you up.

Avoid poison people like the plague -- even the ones on this thread. They're part of the problem, not the solution.

Finally, I and plenty of other FReepers will take your name and your situation before the Lord in faith. We look forward to a good report. God bless and keep you.
65 posted on 11/12/2002 5:18:51 PM PST by ru4liberty
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To: Genesis defender
Here is a link to over 500 jobs in nearby Madison.

http://jobsearch.monster.com/jobsearch.asp?cy=US&re=14&brd=1%2C1863&lid=655&fn=&q=&sort=rv&vw=b
66 posted on 11/12/2002 5:19:20 PM PST by snippy_about_it
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To: Registered
LOL! I can quit any time I want.
67 posted on 11/12/2002 5:20:14 PM PST by ru4liberty
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To: John Jamieson
Are you solving your problem by posting on FR instead of playing games? I think you're still playing games.

Seems so, but personal responsiblity doesn't seem to be real big with this crowd. Go figure, this is supposed to be a conservative site.

68 posted on 11/12/2002 5:20:39 PM PST by riley1992
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To: John Jamieson
"Pond scum"? That's way out of line. Irrespective of where the fault lies in this marriage, calling a man that name solves nothing, save indulging your own need to feel self-righteous.

If indeed you really are praying, I'd save my time. Pray for yourself instead and ask for some humility.

At least the poster is admitting he's screwed up.

69 posted on 11/12/2002 5:20:45 PM PST by marshmallow
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To: Cagey
Seems to me everyone here has a good heart, but is missing the main point: what grown up with a college degree wants to sit around playing video games all day? Something's wrong that has not to do with God or family, but with the individual's heart and mind. That's why I think using all your resources to find a job that you love and will bring you some measure of self-respect is the answer. And if you're addicted to video games, try switching over to the net and visiting Monster or Hotjobs - why do you need us to tell you this?
70 posted on 11/12/2002 5:20:58 PM PST by Burn24
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To: ru4liberty
Me too, unless they boot me.
71 posted on 11/12/2002 5:21:02 PM PST by Registered
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To: Registered
No, seriously... I really can...
72 posted on 11/12/2002 5:21:02 PM PST by ru4liberty
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To: Genesis defender
another link

http://www.jobsinsheboygan.com/
73 posted on 11/12/2002 5:21:13 PM PST by snippy_about_it
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To: Kevin Curry
I second the motion, very appropriate! (But they may not take him!)
74 posted on 11/12/2002 5:21:20 PM PST by John Jamieson
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To: Genesis defender
I'll pray for your wife and son.....when you get a job, I'll add you to my prayers......It took you five years to see the light?...wasted a college education?.....if you were my son, I'd have you by the short hairs....get off the computer and start updating your resume, check the want ads and get to bed early for a fresh job hunting start tomorrow.
75 posted on 11/12/2002 5:21:21 PM PST by mystery-ak
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To: John Jamieson
Only G-d can know this man's heart. This, I have lived a more Christian life than you have, doesn't cut it. It is solving nothing. We are to love one another. When a brother or sister cries out for help we are to lovingly give it. We all fall short of the glory of G-d, including you my brother. Your rags are just as filthy as everyone else's. That's why Jesus came and died on the cross, so we could all be clean, not because of something any of us has done. You are not saved by your works but, by His grace.
76 posted on 11/12/2002 5:22:31 PM PST by MsLady
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To: Genesis defender
May the Lord guide you, provide for you & keep you accountable. May He comfort & lovingly restore your wife. And may your son come to learn that by grace through faith miracles do happen.

77 posted on 11/12/2002 5:22:39 PM PST by k2blader
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To: Registered
Gosh... my heart's starting to pound and my palms are getting all sweaty...

Is the room spinning or is that just me???
78 posted on 11/12/2002 5:22:45 PM PST by ru4liberty
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To: Genesis defender
You've done a brave and powerful thing by admitting your deficiencies. I respect you for doing so.

My best suggestions for you at this time are twofold:

I'm sending my best hopes for you!

79 posted on 11/12/2002 5:23:50 PM PST by Scully
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To: marshmallow
Sometimes the truth hurts. 5 years is long enough. I could have called him worse than that, but FR has rules.
80 posted on 11/12/2002 5:23:50 PM PST by John Jamieson
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