[Mr. Jeeves]

These are great, but no way are they from high school essays. They are more like lines professional writers would come with for a bad fiction contest (note that they are all from fiction, not lines one would find in schoolwork).

[Kevin Curry]

They are more like lines professional writers would come with for a bad fiction contest (note that they are all from fiction, not lines one would find in schoolwork).

Oh, I don't know. I took a creative writing class in high school that gave its students abundant opportunites to churn out startlingly funny lines such as this. The teacher had no sense of humor, she'd mark a budding Ring Lardner down, but some of the students turned out magnificent nuggets of bad metaphors and purple prose.