When I was in my younger days, I weighed a few pounds less, I needn't hold my tummy in to wear a belted dress.
But now that I am older, I've set my body free; There's comfort of elastic Where once my waist would be.
Inventor of those high-heeled shoes my feet have not forgiven; I have to wear a size twelve now, But used to wear a seven.
And how about those pantyhose-- They're sized by weight you see, So how come when I put them on The crotch is at my knee?
I need to wear these glasses As the print's been getting smaller; And it wasn't very long ago I know that I was taller.
Though my hair now has some gray and my skin no longer fits, On the inside, I'm the same old me, but the outside's changed a bit.