There is nothing I like better than to grab a cup of coffee, sit at the computer, and chat with my online friends. The internet provides a little sanity in my otherwise insane existence, but the costs can add up. The average charge for an internet connection, according to my unscientific polling, is about $25.00 per month for a flat-rate connection. Some providers still charge a per-minute rate, which can be exorbitant.
No way will I relinquish my connection when money's tight. I've gone to great lengths to save money and justify the expense to my spouse. Desperate times call for desperate measures! Here are some tips to raise funds for your monthly internet bill:
Scrounge for change under the sofa cushions, behind the refrigerator, in the laundry, and even out of the vacuum cleaner bag if necessary. You may be surprised at the hidden wealth you have waiting for you. Save money on chocolate by pilfering through your kid's Easter baskets and Halloween stash. You could be saving on their dental bills at the same time.
Become environmentally conscious. Send the kids out to collect aluminum cans from the road side. They'll get a great cardiovascular workout, and you'll be alone in the house for a while. Save money on those high-priced designer cereals. Tell the children that Batman eats corn flakes and the prize is good health. Reduce brain rot in your children by canceling the cable–besides, you have your computer and they can read a book.
Confiscate your husband's pocket change. If he notices, blame the kids. Charge your husband every time you have to do a chore on his "honey-do" list. This will reduce the amount of money he can waste on poker or beer with his friends. Fine your offspring 10 cents each time they whine the "M" word. Add the proceeds to the "curse" jar.
Nothing is more important to me than my sanity tie to the outside world. As I sit here, rolling my pennies, I wonder if other mommies covet their connection too. Judging from the number of buddies on my favorite message boards, I'd say I'm in good company.
I'll sacrifice my Lean Cuisine, forego the membership to the gym, and even think about selling a kidney, but I refuse to hand over my internet connection (or my Midol) without a fight.