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Why Men Aren’t Marrying
Epoch Times ^ | 09/16/2026 | Timothy S. Goeglein

Posted on 09/16/2026 9:48:38 PM PDT by SeekAndFind

The Institute for Family Studies (IFS) recently estimated that the gap between unmarried and married men under the age of 40 continues to widen—with 15 million more bachelors than husbands between the ages of 20 to 39 in 2025.

The gap has widened by 12.4 million since 2000, when the gap between married and unmarried stood at 2.6 million.

IFS also reports, according to a General Social Survey, 11 percent of young adults in the early 2000s said they were “not too happy.” That percentage is now at 26 percent. During the same period, the number of married men ages 20–39 dropped by 15 percent.

Leading the unhappiness charge are single men, who are either postponing or rejecting marriage, or not perceived as a suitable marriage partner by single women because of various societal changes.

This is a serious problem for American society.

In his book, “Men and Marriage,” (an expanded edition of his 1973 work “Sexual Suicide”) George Gilder wrote: “Men lust, but they don’t know what for; they wander, and lose track of the goal; they fight and compete, but they forget the prize; they spread seed but spurn the seasons of growth; they chase power and glory but miss the meaning of life.”

Brad Wilcox of IFS agrees with Gilder: “Such men are more likely to be lonely, prone to deaths of despair and unhappy. It’s never good for a society to have large numbers of unattached, dispirited, and unhappy young men.”

A Wall Street Journal article from last year titled, “American Women are Giving Up on Marriage,” touches on several reasons why women are not getting married—whether it be trouble finding a suitable man or choosing a career over marriage.

Disillusioned with the current state of what they perceive to be suitable and available men, they say they are more content with singleness than their male counterparts. A commonly heard complaint is that in their search of a suitable man to marry, they are only finding a world of “man-children.”

So, why has this happened? Why are there so many unmarried young men and why are women having a hard time finding a suitable partner in what would seemingly be an abundant harvest?

First, many of these young men have no idea of what it takes to be a husband or father because they had no one to model that for them. This is just another symptom of the breakdown of the family, a culture of divorce, and a society that has economically awarded single parent families while placing financial burdens on traditional two-parent families.

Secondly, especially among working class men, the jobs that would have traditionally provided for a family have either not kept up with inflation, or in some cases, simply disappeared. In addition, our educational system is no longer providing the needed training for these men to enter the workplace and succeed. Meanwhile, the number of men attending college, the ticket to good paying and stable jobs, continues to decrease.

Finally, numerous voices in our culture have sent a message that women can succeed without having a husband—“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle,” as the saying goes. But when men are not marrying, there is a ripple effect that impacts all aspects of our society.

For example, according to the Centers for Disease Control, the percentage of children born outside of marriage has risen from 33.2 percent of all live births in 2000 to 39.5 percent in 2024. This means a much higher percentage of young people are growing up in single parent households. And single parent households are often more dependent upon government assistance, with boys who grow up without a father often ending up failing socially and economically.

Those numbers also indicate that we’re hurtling toward a demographic disaster. Married couples not only provide a nurturing environment for children but also are more likely to have children.

It is not that young men have given up on marriage. Pew Research reported in 2023 that 74 percent of teenage boys want to be married someday. The problem is that many have no internal road map or GPS to help them get there.

As a society, we need to equip these young men with the skills, personal discipline, and sense of purpose to make them “marriage material.” It is a time for us, as a society, to return to a time when men have purpose—to be faithful husbands, loving fathers, and good providers.

This is going to be a long process, and it will require a long-term societal investment in affirming healthy, traditional two-parent families with engaged fathers who model such discipline and purpose to their sons. Boys do not have a choice when it comes to the families they are born into, but adults can make the right choices to help them flourish and thrive.

Men, women, and our society will be much better off as a result.


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: bachelors; marriage; men; single
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To: Socon-Econ
Bad news for immigration opponents: American men may have to import marriageable foreign wives to replace blue haired, man-hating, baby killing American women

Reality check of immigration enthusiasts: A lot of these mail order brides are gold diggers barely a notch above prostitutes rather than the sweet-natured traditional wives and mothers everyone hopes they would be. I've had several friends with buyer's remorse, one with a Chinese mail order bride, two others with Ukrainians. They aren't the panacea for the marriage problem lots of people claim that they are.

121 posted on 09/17/2026 1:04:53 PM PDT by ek_hornbeck
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To: dfwgator

“Eddie, I want to talk to yooooooooooo!”

~~~~~~~~

HALF!!!!


122 posted on 09/17/2026 1:05:42 PM PDT by z3n (Kakistocracy)
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To: vpintheak

The attitude in society these days (very much reinforced by movies and TV shows) is that any man who cheats on his wife or girlfriend is an amoral cad, whereas a woman who cheats on her husband or boyfriend is a misunderstood princess whose husband is an unworthy loser who doesn’t “understand her” or “fulfill her emotional needs”. Thus even adulterous women can win in marriage courts.


123 posted on 09/17/2026 1:06:29 PM PDT by ek_hornbeck
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To: central_va
Men under 6 feet tall are being naturally deselected.

Seems only white men (and Asians?) under 6 feet tall are being deselected. Plenty of short Hispanic men fathering babies.

124 posted on 09/17/2026 1:06:56 PM PDT by Angelino97
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To: z3n
there are a good percentage of men who are no great prize either, and a fraction of them are downright sleezebags and abusers.

most were probably raised in single parent households ...
125 posted on 09/17/2026 1:12:19 PM PDT by bankwalker (Feminists, like all Marxists, are ungrateful parasites.)
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To: ek_hornbeck
"where all the good women gone"? No man win his right mind wants to put up with a shrill, entitled feminist harpy (often overweight, covered in disgusting tattoos and piercings, and with strange haircuts and dye jobs...

Many conservative pundits and pastors White Knight for such women. They blame men for the poor quality of women.

They say that men haven't inspired women to be better. That men need to MAN UP! and improve themselves, so they'll be worthy of women. Whereupon, presumably, women will happily become devoted, feminine, faithful and loving wives and mothers.

126 posted on 09/17/2026 1:14:56 PM PDT by Angelino97
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To: ek_hornbeck
A woman with a college degree in women's studies or Liberal Arts isn't necessarily going to earn more money than a man who learns a trade.

I suspect many (if not all) of these women with "useless" degrees actually find lucrative jobs with government, academia, NGOs, and even corporate HR departments.

127 posted on 09/17/2026 1:17:30 PM PDT by Angelino97
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To: Albion Wilde

I have a friend I recently told a joke that is funny as heck.

She got all indignant, standing on the proud pedestal of being a feminist.

Don’t know what happened to her.

She was damn cute, really cute, 30 years ago. Now?

The humorectomy was successful, which is what I guess she wanted.


128 posted on 09/17/2026 1:39:47 PM PDT by Vendome (I've Gotta Be Me https://youtu.be/wH-pk2vZG2M)
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To: Vendome
The humorectomy was successful...

It's how you can tell if a woman is a liberal.


129 posted on 09/17/2026 2:41:43 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (The first duty of the American government is to protect American citizens, not illegal aliens. --DJT)
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To: ek_hornbeck
While unemployed, basement-dwelling 30 something males certainly do exist


130 posted on 09/17/2026 2:46:10 PM PDT by MinorityRepublican
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To: Albion Wilde

These are very good.


131 posted on 09/17/2026 3:00:39 PM PDT by HombreSecreto (The life of a repo man is always intense)
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To: Angelino97

“Many conservative pundits and pastors White Knight for such women. They blame men for the poor quality of women.”

It is those pundits and pastors that are part of the problem—and not a part of the solution.

Somebody needs to “man up” and deliver the bad news to women—women are the primary problem—90%+.


132 posted on 09/17/2026 3:07:32 PM PDT by cgbg (Four seconds is all it takes to beat the brainwashing.)
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To: Angelino97

“Plenty of short Hispanic men fathering babies.”

Yup—social circle is critical.

Short men just need to avoid those social circles (online dating being the most obvious one) where the game is rigged for them to lose.

If short men could rule large empires throughout history over tall men they can suck it up and do what needs to be done to get women.


133 posted on 09/17/2026 3:10:35 PM PDT by cgbg (Four seconds is all it takes to beat the brainwashing.)
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To: Albion Wilde

Painfully accurate!


134 posted on 09/17/2026 3:17:33 PM PDT by Tommy Revolts (a.k.a Warpaint)
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To: dfwgator

“It started with The Pill, totally changed the whole dynamic”
.
Absolutely.

I was in my first year of college when my Sociology professor asked our huge class, “What development will change our society the most?”

I got it wrong...


135 posted on 09/17/2026 3:48:23 PM PDT by Does so (Book:"The Party of Death"...Dem☭¢rats ™ ® © ≣ ½⅓⅔¼¾ ⅛⅜⅝⅞ ⅓ ⅕ ⅖ ⅗ ⅘ ⅙ ⅚)
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To: central_va

The number one obstacle to being successful with women, is convincing yourself of reasons to not hit on them every time you get the urge to.


136 posted on 09/17/2026 3:56:46 PM PDT by ansel12
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To: ansel12

Why there is internet porn.


137 posted on 09/17/2026 4:01:15 PM PDT by central_va (I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn)
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To: Fledermaus

“She earns twice my best year now and it’s growing like crazy.”

My wife makes good money but banks it in 401’s. My intake comes from retirement from 4 different places and a lot of tax free money along with some business interests. All protected by a smart CPA.

wy69


138 posted on 09/17/2026 7:49:53 PM PDT by whitney69
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To: central_va

There is no replacement for a real live woman, young males need to learn how to get them, and step number one is, walk across that room and strike up a conversation.


139 posted on 09/17/2026 8:21:24 PM PDT by ansel12
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To: ansel12

No we dont.

If the juice isnt worth the squeeze, we can invest in oirselves.


140 posted on 09/17/2026 9:15:14 PM PDT by Jonty30 (Male simping and female promiscuity is the same thing. Resources without reciprocation.)
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