stop draining his credit cards
“stop draining his credit cards”
I hate to admit it but I’ve been married 3 times. Each time I went into the marriage with zero credit card debt and came out of each one with 5 figure debt. All 3 were professional women who made decent money (as did I). It was just never enough. It’s a miracle I never went bankrupt.
I think this comment underscores a central issue in marriage at this point in American history. Marriage is supposed to be a commitment to each other, a vow to literally love and honor each other, and from a religious perspective a union sanctified by God. When one or both partners don't prioritize, aspire, and work to make their marriage better, their nuclear family happy, healthy, and prosperous, and to make each other's lives better than they would be if they weren't together, the marriage suffers and diminishes the life of at least one partner.
When you marry someone who voluntarily commits more of their quality time, attention, and efforts to someone or something other than you (preferentially hanging out with friends or their family of origin, preoccupation with social media, sitting in front of a TV, preferentially pursuing their own activities and hobbies that are only entertaining to them) this sends the unmistakable message that you are not a primary focus of their life.
When your partner hurts you financially, particularly when they aren't contributing financially, this also sends an unmistakable message that your well-being and happiness is not a priority of theirs. If you marry someone for a specific arrangement it had better be an agreed upon arrangement - or it will never lead to mutual happiness.
The world is difficult enough to navigate. If you combine your life with someone who doesn't truly respect you, doesn't truly love you, you will have a harder time navigating it and will be in some way diminished. It obviously gets worse when someone is verbally, emotionally, or physically abusive.
People need to think about these things way, way before planning a wedding. Getting married because it's 'the thing to do' is not a good plan. It's an incredibly serious thing, and can make or break your life. My overall point is that people really need to think about what marriage is, what they are willing to give to marriage, and whether they truly know, love, and trust the person they are contemplating entering a lifelong partnership with. We are often way too frivolous as a society, and this not only puts us at risk, it also puts our children at risk.
IMHO
"stop draining his credit cards"