Heh, I was a military brat...my dad was a 30 year vet, serving through the end of WWII to the end of Vietnam...
My dad retired as a Commander in the Navy. We never referred to him as “Commander”, sometimes as Dad, and always in interactive conversation as “Sir”.
My dad was an intimidating figure to my friends after he retired, not because he was mean or nasty, but because he projected authority. He never tried to be friends with us in my family, and never went out of his way to interact with my friends.
They kept their distance, but would refer to him in the third person as “The Commander”. It was respectful, too, not mocking.
Heh, he used to drive a great big 1973 Buick LeSabre, a boat that would float up and down as you drove it up the highway! It was rusty, and as a joke, my buddies and I were going to spray paint it gray, put a couple of cleats on the front fender, and paint a hull number on the side of each front fender in the standard Navy way!
I wondered if you would sign into this thread, and wonder no more! Hope you had a merry Christmas Day, rl!