It’s a matter of self defense.
Exactly correct. I've known two fully functional alcoholics in my life. One was a neighbor, the sweetest old lady you'd ever meet in your life. The first clue anyone ever had was when she (Marge) required surgery and afterwards freaked out about spiders all over the walls. Surgeon told her husband (Bob) she was an alcoholic, and to go home, turn the house upside down and find all the places she hid alcohol from him during their 50+ year marriage. The surgeon was exactly correct. Bob found all the bottles, he was shocked. He never knew.
The second fully functional alcoholic (and he was ONLY fully functional when he was drunk) was my own father. A very smart man with a patent to his name just could never stop drinking. He died of alcohol induced dementia at 72.
When we talk about walking away to save one's self as a matter of self defense, that's what I had to do. He was 50 when I walked away. I saw him again a short time before he passed. You see, his drinking utterly destroyed our family. Even though he's been dead since 2010, to this day we kids cannot bear to be around each other because just being together reminds us all of the damage he did.
Sometimes, it's not just the alcoholic that gets walked away from, it's everyone who reminds you of them too.
Best to you, CPB and thanks Lurker for your post. It gave me the courage to type the above.
Alcoholics end up changing their brain chemistry. It gets to the point that they can’t function properly without alcohol. Takes much will to stop and get your brain programmed back. Sometimes the brain doesn’t work right ever again. Alcohol gives them that fix and brain functions back but they drink past that point. They are alcoholics of course.