Unfortunately, I’ve had quite a bit of ‘experience’ with domestic abuse situations (family/friends/& worked for police). Guys intent on doing harm do not respect protective orders (just like criminals don’t respect gun laws). Often, getting a protective order just makes things worse with the offender. At least you can tell police you have a protective order and that gives them a reason to arrest people violating that order ... if you’re not dead already & the offender is still on scene.
Domestic abuse is a lot more complicated than the average person thinks/knows. Trying to extricate yourself, especially with kids, can be very difficult. Getting a protective order and actually ‘leaving’ are the most dangerous times. Someone I knew was going to have her divorce finalized on a Tuesday .... Sunday, her soon-to-be ex ambushed her as she was returning home from church .... beat her almost to death, then shot/killed her. He then called 911 & shot himself while on the phone with them. Another woman known to us was a receptionist at a law firm - her estranged husband/’ex’ showed up at work - asked her to step out of the office to ‘talk’ to him, which she did so as not to have her private matters broadcast to everyone ... he shot her in the head, killing her right there in the parking lot.
The mom/3 kids was a ‘local’ killing for me. Really breaks my heart - glad they at least caught the b@stard and he should rot in jail. A lot of times these guys ‘off’ themselves - a little surprised he didn’t do it. Then, just up the road, we had the UVA shooting a week ago, guy caught not that far away (my county, just the other side of it). It’s a crazy, messed up world ... don’t work for the police any more, but that experience has me walking around with my head on a swivel (high situational awareness).
First thing I do in a situation like that, and it has happened. Is loan them my shotgun and show them how to use it.
The hardest thing is to convince them there is real danger. It is either he/she or you.