That sounds like the mindset I had in high school.
First off, women aren’t a monolith. There are some dumbass women out there that have stupid criteria by which they choose men. There are men who do the same. But they don’t ALL want one thing. It does so happen that the one thing most of them do NOT want (in spite of their saying otherwise) is a ‘nice guy’. Nice guys are boring. There’s not a whole lot to talk about. They’re so busy being nice that they look weak. Well adjusted women have a desire for a strong, competent, and take-charge man. A man who takes-charge, not because they think they’re entitled to it, but because they’re a natural leader.
Women often mistake the asshats who are just jerks for what they’re looking for, because the ‘nice guys’ are so damn busy being giant wusses that they never show that they’re a real man. (If they even are...)
I used to be a ‘nice guy’. I went through all the training and indoctrination to be one of those guys who gets ignored. But I figured out early on that being a ‘nice guy’ was getting me the girls I didn’t want and I couldn’t get near the ones I did. So, I corrected.
Does that mean I’m no longer nice? Not at all. But I bring value to the table. I bring ambition, drive, success, knowledge, and experience with me. I am strong in mind and body. And when I want something, I damn well make it known. I don’t sit around and hope someone gives it to me like a ‘nice guy’.
At the end of the day, I still worship the ground my wife walks on, because I love her and she’s my best friend. I knew it the night I met her that she was the one. But if I had been ‘nice’ when that chance came along, I wouldn’t have gotten anywhere with her.
I tried that. It just got dirt in my mouth, and chipped teeth from the pebbles.
Someone on a previous thread pointed out that women aren’t necessarily attracted to the bad boy types because of their badness, but because women are attracted to self-confidence in a man.
IMO, the bad boy types are usually arrogant beyond words and women interpret that, or rather misinterpret that, as self-confidence.
I, too, was the “nice guy,” who tried to not offend and such.
I guess I lost my care about always not offending. I am polite, but I know how to put others in their place and force them to admit they are wrong in front of others, of course, when they are actually wrong.
I very much push boundaries, in a healthy way, if the occasion calls for it. I get a lot of enjoyment from that, yet, I have some liberals that admire how I do these things, and they trust me. I am generally transparent and I’m willing to ask the hard questions and not be too afraid of being embarrassed for having asked a stupid question.