Well without knowing your age, you never know!
If i ever got in the unlikely position of being able to find a new mate, im like u in that i would not want to let my guard down. By the same token im not so sure i would want to inflict myself on someone else cause im not ez to deal with myself. I took a personality test and it seemed dead on...
Conclusion...im a complex person!
I’m 61.
And yeah, I’m screwed up a bunch but I’m comfortable with it. I’m disability retired from the Army so I’m financially stable. All in all, life is good.