good message from confucius
People need to remember that we can only forgive those who have harmed us. If people have harmed others, we cannot forgive them for what they have done to others. That’s for the others to do if they want.
Also, forgiving doesn’t mean we have to think what they did was okay, acceptable, not wrong, etc. Or that we have to have a relationship with them if they have not changed, or continue to cause harm to others or ourselves.
It’s an interesting thing, forgiveness. Sometimes a good person does or says something harmful to us. But it’s a lapse, or they succumbed to anger, or greed or whatever, temporarily, and are sorry. I can’t count how many times I’ve asked others for forgiveness. And often those good people who succumb will ask forgiveness.
It’s different, and a bit more difficult, to forgive those who don’t care that they caused harm, are not sorry about it, and may even continue on the same path. We can forgive - instructed to by the wise - but doesn’t mean we have to imagine they were right to do so, or that we have to ever trust them or even be close to them ever again.
It’s our job to forgive, but up to the other person to repent about it. If they don’t, the burden is still on them. Forgiving others helps greatly to take our own pain and sting away. BTDT...