Super-slide -
I said almost those exact words once and got a 4 month suspension from bridge competitions. I was told many months later that if I’d just said I was sorry and wished I’d never done it, I would have received probation.
My crime was lying to a bridge director about who I was so I could get a newly-deceased friend his last 23 masterpoints (of 300) so he’d be listed as a Life Master in the international bridge magazine before his wife reported his death. At George’s funeral, his wife said becoming a LM was something he wanted more than anything, and she was heartbroken for him that he didn’t achieve it. I knew I couldn’t help George but I thought I could help his wife in her grief.
So I entered a tournament in New Orleans in his name and played as him, thinking nobody would know. I was a relatively new player and learned that people back home follow these events online and wondered how a dead guy was winning masterpoints. I got him all the points he needed, and a few more, but someone reported me. George didn’t get his points or his posthumous LM status and I got suspended. The disciplinary committee asked me if I was sorry and asked if I knew then what I know now (that day before them) would I do it again. My crime was lying to a director (about my identity), so it didn’t seem like I should try to get out of it by lying to the disciplinary committee too, so I said yes I would do it again to help a friend’s bereaved spouse, and I took my punishment.
Lest anyone here who plays bridge and understands masterpoints think that some brilliant player was taking advantage of the field, at the time, George and I were separated by only 26 masterpoints in ability, and he had all the gold, silver and red points he needed to become a Life Master. He’d have become a LM on his own if he had just lived another 4 months.
That was in New Orleans, and if I hadn’t believed in God before that tournament, I would have when it was over. George was an angel on my shoulder all week and I will swear that he was helping me. As a new player, I watched world class players arguing with each other as this novice was leaving their table. The things that happened that week are almost unbelievable. I get chills to this day when I think about it.
That’s the totality of my life of crime, except for the speeding ticket I seem to get about every 6-7 years. So, yes I did it, no I’m not sorry, and my circumstances are quite different now so, no, I probably wouldn’t do it again.