I’ve worn a kilt quite often....Only problem with that chair is the wood is generally cold.
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It seems the comforts provided for the cucumber and kiwis would be negated by what appears to be a ridge that would wedge between the buns. It looks to me like cold would be the least problem.
Yeah, my first thought was “ouch, me hemis”!
...Look a little hopeful to me, but then again, I'm a girl and we wear things under our kilts!