Sometimes, grandparents have a tendency to expect more out of children than they can or are willing to give. It doesn’t make any of it right or wrong.
Because I was pretty much forced out at 17, I never expected more of my children than what I saw that they could comfortably do. They both joined the military and all I could do was wait and see. Now, there are grandchildren and greats that I never or seldom see, so in some ways I’m still waiting for the final analysis.
Any mistakes I made in helping my children become who they are were made in ignorance because I didn’t know any better.
I assume that everyone is doing the best they can with what they have to work with, in the absence of other information.