Jaqui Noire, I have asked you before. Where is my prize for being #1 on your “Mom, they’re picking on me!” chart? And I object to you not using “Jaqui Noire”...I believe I was the first to call you a name
(aside letter to my mom in Heaven: Dear Mom, I’m sorry that I take such pleasure in calling someone a name. but, MOM! This guy, you wouldn’t even be mad if you heard I beat him up at recess! You’d be proud of your oldest daughter. Dad wouldn’t even be mad at me. love, blu)
Now, Jaqui, let’s just make sure I’m not #1 with a bullet, ok?