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I’m currently in the dating pool. I’m 43.

DRINKS

First date is a drink. I ask to meet for happy hour at someplace decent. (not applebees, not outback, not olive garden)

If we’re not a match, I’ve only committed to a drink, both in time and expense.

I pay for the drinks.

DINNER

If we hit it off, it’s easy to just ask for the next available table, or to grab a hightop in the bar area. The food will be good, because I’ve chosen a decent place.

I pay for dinner, regardless of how it goes. Most decent women will offer to split the check, but will allow me to pay when I insist.

AFTER DINNER

If dinner goes well, I ask her to play pool, throw darts, or grab dessert at a more “gritty” bar or diner.

If she agrees, we generally have a good time and take it from there.

If she refuses because it’s “beneath her”, we’re not a match, and I generally won’t ask her out again. If there’s a valid reason to refuse (over dressed, getting late, etc) I take that into account.

Dating as an investment. You have to invest the time, money, and effort necessary to find what you’re looking for.