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(She’s got Marty Feldman eyes (Also thanks to Kim Carnes)Her hair is gray and old
Her lips chapped and dry
Her hands are always cold
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes
Her once good looks are gone
She’ll no longer entice
A big mole on her nose
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes

She’ll unease you
She has fleas too
And she has Hodgkin’s disease too
She’s atrocious
Sometimes she forgets to make the toilet bowl flush
She’s got Kirstie Alley big fat thighs
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes

She’s from a mental home
You know her mind’s not right
Her hair she doesn’t comb
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes
She’ll scream or mumble at you
Repeats everything twice
She’s got a few loose screws
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes

She’s an old shrew
And she’s been to
Other planets in a U.F.O. too
She’s atrocious
And she knows just what it takes to make you go nuts
All the boys think she’s a guy
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes

She’ll impede you
And deceive you
All the better just to leave you
She’s atrocious
When she scrubs her back she’ll use the toilet bowl brush
All the boys think she’s a guy
She’s got Marty Feldman eyes