Btw, I do not want to seem argumentative or cantankerous, but why when a woman is asked/confronted about their "number", do they almost without fail, lie and under count it? ("I can count the number of guys I have been with on one hand") Its because of the perceived devalue in SMV.
Its all a matter of individuality... I learned a long time ago not to judge other folks relationships, whatever works for them is all that matter.
Women probably under count same reasons I would assume most guys brag, social pressure, real or perceived. I think women put more pressure on themselves based on what they see in the media and elsewhere over what is really out there. I can’t imagine meeting anyone in their 40s unless they were married young and recently divorced or widowed or something that doesn’t have a sexual past with some interesting chapters.
I do agree no one wants to wind up married to someone who is going to cheat,( unless they are into that kind of thing, and yes, there are folks who are indeed into it), and paying a very expensive price down the road.
But that’s not the topic, the topic is women being alone, or not finding Mr Right, and that to me is not so much a function of their sexual pasts as it is a general function of their very distorted view of men and relationships in general.
Women aren’t stupid, even without guidance they can quickly learn that most guys are after sex, and have little care for a longer term relationship. That’s simple enough to figure out even for someone with no one to give them advice or guidance. What’s not so simple to figure out, it seems anyway, is that men are not women. Men are men, and yes there will be guys who will truly honor and cherish you and want an honest relationship with you, but they are not going to be berated and treated like children because you think you should be treated as a princess 24/7 or that when they grab your ass and call you sweetie from time to time you take it as a personal insult and claim patriarchial oppression etc etc etc.
Guys are guys, they can love a woman beyond measure and still wind up being accused of objectifying them or some other overly sensitive nonsense because the woman only has feminist dogma nonsense as her perspective.
And I do agree many women miss a great life partner because they decide they aren’t ready for that yet in their life, because they are 28 and still have plans, only by the time they decide they are ready they are 38 or 43 and that guy found someone who was ready, as had most the other guys serious about building a life with someone.
Guys may be base, but they aren’t all jackasses, though at times we all do stupid jackass things.
Women don’t want to hear it, but fertility drops off significantly particularly once you hit 40... natural fertility rate at age 45 is literally 1% for a woman. I am not saying women in their late 30s or early 40s can’t get pregnant and have kids, they do... but the risks are higher and the probabilities are lower.
So if a guy in the same situation, decided to wait to start his family and is late 30s or 40s, he’s going to likely date a woman younger than himself, may not like it, but that’s the way it is, if his goal is to have children. A woman can date a guy younger than herself, but it won’t improve her fertility prospects.
Personally, I think anyone over 40, male or female who has never been married is going to be a tough person to wed, by that state in their lives, most folks are pretty set in their ways and if they have not had to compromise with other folks about their lives to that point its going to be a very difficult transition to married life where compromise and selflessness are required to make it work.
That’s just my .02 cents, not saying it can’t or never work out, just saying its a much tougher task to make it.