“Think about who’s going to take care of Ellie if you blow your brains out.
Ellie needs you, my Friend.”
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LOL! How could I disappoint those gorgeous huge brown eyes... With her big floppy ears..
Anyway... I have a move to recommend, for any dog owners or dog lovers: Jack Black and Ben Stiller, I think, in Envy. Jack Black’s character invents Vapoorizer... ? which magically cleans up dog poop. It is a really funny movie which is sadly underrated.
Anyway, thank you all again. :)
Please go back and reread all of these messages to you and if you’ve already done that, do it again until you fall asleep.
It sounds as though your deepest fear is the lack of money to fix the problems you are facing today and the loss of your family members who are not with you now (except for Ellie!). And your own health and strength is failing. Remember that fear is false evidence appearing real. While you might think there is no way out but to die by suicide, the way out is truly only through the problems.
Bundle up all the troubling thoughts in your mind in a big sack and light a virtual match to it. Out of the ashes imagine life as you wish it to be... a repaired house, the warmth of your family close to you. Ask and it shall be received. Share the ups and downs with us and trudge the road of happy destiny along with us. We need you, too.