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When I was in high school in the late ‘60s, I got a one cylinder Honda motorcycle. I was suddenly everybody’s best friend (those who wanted a ride home from school to avoid riding the school bus).

One day I gave a ride to a friend who weighed about 185. I was barely 140. My friend thought it would be cute to lean the wrong way on turns. As an inexperienced driver, he made me turn wide and I barely missed the curb on the far side.

Thinking fast, I accelerated on the next straight section of road, stood up, then put my anal pore firmly in his face. I then made a glorious gaseous emission directly into his nostrils. He had nowhere to go, so he got a good dose. By this “study’ he should still be benefiting from the inoculation.