Speaking of crimes, the Affirmative Action Officer must, must I say, be written up for a really bad hairdo
That Uniform makes her look really fat
Her patrol car is making a bad traffic situation even worse,
Wait, Wait! This just in ...... officer's surname reported as "Crisco."
Because she's fat in the can.
He is therefore biologically unable to tolerate Manhattan. He's damn lucky Officer Conchita Banana didn't have him deported.