you can only affect how they turn out if you raise them from the time they are a small kitten properly.
I’ve had Titus since he was a kitten-and I thought Midget was a 6-month-old because of her small size, but when I took her to the vet for shots, it turned out that she was between 11/2 and 2 years old, and just never grew-I had her spayed the next week.
Yeti boy was already about 2 when he turned up lost, with a collar but no chip. He is affectionate but isn’t into being carried around like the other two-just as well, since he weighs 22 pounds...
Even then, individual personality quirks have a big impact on how they turn out.
I had a cat who had been born in my closet, and so was socialized from day one. She was always very timid and skittish. She liked to be nearby, but was almost impossible to handle. I currently have a couple of cats who were feral until about 4 months of age, who remain somewhat skittish. They cannot be picked up, but they do like to be petted. Their behavior is not much different than that of the timid cat who was born in my closet.