Your understanding of what believing/living for Jesus represents is superficial, if common. Pilate asked the eternal question :
What shall I do then with Jesus which is called Christ? They all say unto him, Let him be crucified. (Matthew 27:22)
For what you do with Jesus Christ implicitly reveals what you truly love and want, and determines where you will spend eternity, with the Lord Jesus or with your sins.
And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God. (John 3:19-21)
When one rejects Christ he is choosing sin over the One who is the utter opposite of evil, and which will be eternally recompensed, according to the degree of sin relative to the truth and ability he had. (Lk. 12:48)
And yes, this is just, as to reject Christ, and which in essence one does by willfully choosing to sin, evidences not just one choice but many. And finally rejecting Christ is in essence the sum total of all his sins, a result of rejecting innate light God gave, and which in essence souls do even if they never heard of him,.
Nor does God require us to believe and thus live for Him due to Him needing anything, as He does not, (Acts 17:25) but it is not only right to love that which is holy, and trust in that which is omnipotent, but it is what is best for man.
Idolatry is the mother of all sin, and by setting our ultimate affection, or giving our ultimate allegiance, or finding our ultimate security in something created and finite, then we are making that to be god, but which at best will ultimately fail us.
I am very familiar with all the theological mumbo-jumbo, about sin and choice and gifts, etc., etc. People like you spout it endlessly and at the same time rail about superficiality.
The bottom line is, if someone such as myself, who examines carefully the message of the gospel and then says, “thanks, but no thanks, I honestly don’t believe it,” the result (assuming the Bible is true) is that I will be tortured beyond our ability to comprehend forever without end. I find that impossible to reconcile with the notion of an infinitely loving God. That’s one reason why I have so much trouble believing it.