[old and tired]

ut I was asking more for the comment that the guests should pay the cost of their meal. I would NEVER have asked friends and families to do that. However, if that IS the norm, I will be going to very few weddings, if any.

It's not the norm that couples ask for cash - THAT would be rude. The responsibility for knowing falls on the guest. It's rude to attend if you can't cover your plate and your presence wouldn't really be missed by the couple or perhaps their parents.

[hattend]

Guess I never knew the wedding etiquette.

And I probably will not attend many more weddings without a lot of nagging.

I got kind of put off giving around $500 in gifts/cash to a nephew in law who’s marriage lasted less than a week.

Almost asked for the gifts back.