Well...The closest was a gall bladder issue that also shut down my liver and pancreas...which my healthy 24 year old house framing self didn’t notice till I was less than 24 hours away from death.
Checked in the hospital Friday night....next morning at 7 am I was wheeled into surgery for a 12+ hour procedure. 3 days ICU...3 weeks stay..2 weeks nothing but ice chips and jello. Had 5 drainage tubes going in my gut...3 of which stayed in until about 6 weeks after getting out.
The pain was exquisite...but far worse than anything was going without food for 2 weeks...hooked up to a morphine machine...with nothing to do but watch the fast food commercials on TV all day.
Funny thing...I went into surgery with 60/40 odds. The doc said he was betting on the heavy end....but everyone else in my life was worried. I was too...until a moment that hit out of nowhere as I was being wheeled down to surgery...for some reason....I just knew I was going to make it...was sure of it all of a sudden. I looked up at my wife..parents..favorite uncle...and best friend with a silly ass grin and said,”Y’all quit being such pu$$ies”....quite loudly. Loud enough the nurse doing the pushing slapped me upside the top of my head...out of reflex. I was given a “Happy shot” before they come got me....but that instant I was hit with that feeling...I was sober as a church mouse. Seconds later high as a kite spewing vulgarity at the closest people in my life.
That was the closest....I guess. Between a career in framing, erection, and other trades that work in the air..a youth spent buying $200 beaters and putting $800 of dressed down motors in them....in order to hustle the cash off of the rich kids who were bought new mustangs and camaros...bought high rise intakes and 750 double pumpers to put on top of stock small block heads...and thought they had something. We didn’t drag race....we raced down an 8 mile country road through a river bottom full of deer. Lower River road...now Riverside drive near Six flags over Georgia. I’ll have a memory pop in my head out of nowhere...and I’ll shudder.
That’s not counting my younger partying and hustling days in the not so nice parts of Hotlanta. Or my USN stint. Or the time my wife and I...and two other couples were out in a pontoon on lake west point....and my warnings of the coming squall were ignored...up until the wind got up over 30 mph...and we were 45 minutes boat ride away from camp. If it wasn’t for the lightning popping almost nonstop...we woulda sheltered in a cove in what I’m guessing were 60 mph winds....that caused wakes big enough to cover the channel marker bouys...unheard of there.
God wants me here for something....pretty bad evidently. That scares me more than death.
I hear you! My pancreas exploded on the way to Yosemite one fine spring day.
The pain was impressive, and I had the privilege of watching the paramedics working on my body from somewhere near the ceiling.
I don’t count it as a near death experience, but as a OOBE.
Anyway I had the morphine machine too. I’m grateful for the experience, I never really understood how someone could be addicted before that. Now I do.