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To: AUJenn
I have 2 in my close family. I let it be known that it isn't acceptable in my house or in front of my daughter. We went to some family functions and one started to smooch on the other. We left. When we have functions at our home, the family member is welcome, the partner is not. After awhile, the family member was left out of most family functions and actually accepted that we had the right not to observe their perversion and they would come alone to be with their family. They both have now become Christians and dumped their partners. I don't know what they do in private, but they no longer trumpet their lifestyle in our company. I don't browbeat the alcoholics that fall off the wagon nor do I pry to see if they are still frequenting gay bars. The point is, they are back in the closet. I don't maul my wife in front of them and I don't want my family exposed to their proclivities.

Having said that, we also have had to uninvite the family fornicators. When I was homeschooling my daughter, I told the unmarried inlaws to find a motel if they wanted to attend family functions. I let them know I don't believe in unmarried sex and wouldn't provide a place for them to practice it. One even got married and is teaching Sunday school in church now. The other is broken up and still a little upset that they can't flop at my house with a new beau.

I have the right to control what happens in my home and in front of my family. They believed it would just be easier for me to accept their lifestyle and give in. They lost! When Thanksgiving comes at my home and 15 people come here and 2 or 3 end up in a motel or not invited at all, they are the ones that do without and everybody knows why.

Too many people allow these "in your face" types to push them around. You may do without for awhile, bit then again, they may get embarrassed if you let them know you won't give in. When it first started, there was family trouble and I was the one causing unnecessary trouble. After awhile, it became obvious that they were the ones being unreasonable. I am a Christian first! Everyone, in the end, figured out that no one has to accept anything. They will try to outnumber you, but you just have to have Christ first in your life. If Christ isn't the reason you want them to change, you will loose. I was able to raise my daughter with good values and point out the catastrophic lives of the others. From drugs, diseases, jail, and misery, my daughter saw the end results and pain of their chosen lifestyles. She was able to witness their transformation into a "regular" human being after a life of debauchery and misery. They demonstrated God's way is the best way to my daughter and saved her a life of mistakes. One brother in law actually died drinking himself to death. I've seen many families give in thinking they want to be "reasonable". It doesn't help a thing. Call it tough love or an intervention, whatever you want, just reject what isn't right. You will be happier and you may even affect their life. Name calling and arguing doesn't fix a thing, but living your principles will.

When you start out, you just have to be firm, but not nasty. Just tell them you don't accept what they do in your house. You may get uninvited from family events at first, but they will either give in or you just won't have family functions anymore.

There is a Bible verse about putting Jesus above your family members. It says you must "hate" them. That was a hard saying at first, but you find out later the wisdom of it. If you just think you don't want to be around homosexuality, you will either give in eventually, or do and say things you will be sorry for later. Just love God and be fair and consistent.

81 posted on 12/08/2011 1:29:14 PM PST by chuckles
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To: chuckles
I think that a lot of people these days are going through what you have, or at least something similar. It's not easy, particularly at this time of year.

We want to be close to our families, but some things cannot be avoided.

88 posted on 12/08/2011 1:38:55 PM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: chuckles
I think that a lot of people these days are going through what you have, or at least something similar. It's not easy, particularly at this time of year.

We want to be close to our families, but some things cannot be avoided.

89 posted on 12/08/2011 1:38:56 PM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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