Posted on 06/04/2011 2:23:31 PM PDT by Feline_AIDS
See, that's what I keep coming back to. I read about your experience, and it's obvious to me that in reality your wedding was priceless to you, cherished still decades later. You got it for a song in the greater scheme of things. Something that I don't the overly pragmatic can ever truly appreciate.
And yep, I'm a guy. I had very little to do with my own wedding. I have no opinions on dresses, flowers, or what color brings out anyones eyes. I smiled, nodded and understood that while the marriage was about us, and hopefully children, the wedding was about her.
Well, I did have to explain to the groomsmen that they were wearing pink cumberbunds to match the bridesmaids dresses, and that was honestly all the stress I could handle. I was fearing for my life at points in that conversation. You'd have to have known these guys. Dressing up was cleaner denim than you wore to work. Not clean, just cleaner.
That's what I want for my daughter. A guy who understands that marriage is complicated, but has the God given sense to know that weddings are simple in that they're solely about the bride, and his only job is to remember his lines.
I feel you. I’m the first to admit that I married what out of my league. Our only commonality is that we’re both bookworms, and well educated. She was truly a princess and I was truly a pauper.
I live in South Jersey now...grew up in philly.
My poor husband had to get acclimated to my family. He was raised differently than I was and we met at college. He was used to the mid-west way of things.
In two weeks, we will be meeting our oldest daughter’s boyfriend’s parents...a year and half going out...they live 2 blocks from us and they are Italian descent (his college grad party). She’s worrying about this meeting. I think she’s worring about me and his mom meeting ;)It will be fine.
I’m looking forward to it. He’s a great guy. I like him. I bet his mom is the reason he’s so nice.
Thank you. My husband, and a few on this board, seem to realize this. Then there are the others, the most vocal, imo, who still don’t get it.
Why does it always come down to, with far too many women, how other women look/dress?
We have a parent at our school, her kid is in K, she is absolutely gorgeous. Beautiful. The woman is hot. Her daughter, in K, is just fine. no problems academically or behaviorally, But people hate her, trash her, because she’s so hot. The K teacher and I were talking yesterday, and this parent is always willing to do stuff for the class. But she’s hated because she’s hot. All the frumpy women and dickless men trash her for how she dresses, looks. It’s insane.
I think we were raised in similar economics - but just a different viewpoint on the wedding thing between Midwest and East Coast. Guess what kind of wedding my daughters will probably be getting? ;)
But yes - she is out of my league - she’s a far better person than I am!
My wife’s brother married a New Jersey Italian girl. Now talk about WEDDINGS!?
Heck - even going over to their house for dinner is an event. They brought out the spaghetti and I figured - “Oh, I love spaghetti”, filled up my plate and had my dinner. Little did I know it was just the first course of many, and I didn’t have much room left over for the two kinds of meat, numerous vegetable dishes, more types of pasta, etc.
Super nice family, but too over the top for me in EVERYTHING they did.
LMAO! That is their only job when it comes to the wedding. They get input in the church service but everything else is all about the bride (and her mom). The marriage is about the bride and groom, the wedding is about the bride (and her mom). My husband was hilarous. He wanted, or thought he wanted, to be a part of it. An hour later, he was done, lol.
LOL. gosh you sound just like my husband.
Kill me now about the pink. There was no pink in my wedding. But if there were, you can rest assured the groomsen would be wearing a pink cumberbund.
In my world, the wedding is all about the bride (and her mom) and the marriage is about the bride and groom and we stay out of it.
Yeah. We tend to be over the top that way. It’s all about the food most of the time. And the bar.
So many memories. Some saying to my Mom, hey ma, not everyone wants to eat all the time, and her replying, everyone wants a good meal. It’s just what we grew with.
My husband’s best friend, back when we were first married, and he was in his wedding in Palm Beach, FL...we went there for the wedding, paid by the bride and groom as it should be(amd as we did for our bridal party), my husband was best man...Jewish wedding. My first ever. Rehearsal dinner was at Breakers. OMG. Unbelievable. It was amazing. And there was a debutante ball going on in the room across from us and the mother of the groom took me to watch it, explaining all the tradition. It was fascinating.
Why do old busybodies feel compelled to dictate what kind of dress anyone should wear?
You obviously haven’t seen a playboy interview if you think most popular bridal gowns belong in playboy.
I grew up going to fancy weddings and firehall weddings and house weddings.
Most of them, regardless of where they were held, were fun.
That sounds like something hubby might’ve done to make me crack up...we went the JotP route also. Frankly, it was much less stress! And we had plenty of entertainment watching the guy before us nearly keel over from the blood draw in the lab, too.
I was at a wedding where they had a cash bar.WTF....I gave the happy couple a crisp 50 and now I have to buy my own gin and tonic.
Then there was the wedding where the bride and groom paid for the party withthe procceeds from the gifts.
And what is the deal with a bridal dance? It is like a cheap lap dance. at least the stripper stays on your lap for the entire song. Again, I gave you cash, and now you are hitting us up for more dough. Why not a 50-50 raffle or a Chinese auction?
I have been to fancy,hotel weddings, Countryclub weddings and firehall weddings and firehall wedding beat them all.
The last one there was so much food and drink that the DJ told everyone to go up for more food three times. And it was good food. Really good food.
Money dont mean squat. It is the planning that makes a wedding.
At our wedding, the bride wore silk homesewn dress and veil of her design, bridesmaids wore similar designed dresses in cotton, also sewn by the bride. Church wedding, reception in relatives backyard. modest catering, great fun. Married 49 years next week.
I was at the local park last July on a 90+ degree day. There was a wedding party (bride, groom, 6 bridesmaids, six attendants, a young ring bearer and a flower girl in tuxes and wedding gowns) being photographed. They, of course had to do something "special" for the occasion, so the photographer tried to have the entire party jump all at once and photograph them in mid-air.
Let me tell you that it takes a lot of attempts to get 16 people to all jump at the exact same time and shoot them at the apex of the jump. By the time they were done the were all drenched in perspiration and very unhappy.
Of course, $3,000 dollars later the bride probably has a nice album collecting dust.
It is a **personal** preference of mine. I would **prefer** that brides dress more modestly.
congrats....and many more
No I just read all of the comments in this section before I replied and then read the ones after.How is that stalking?I thought everyone read the comments before they replied?I already said it was fine what you did if that was your thing I’m just much more frugal and never had the desire to be a faux princess like some women do.I think it’s pretty petty of you to go “OH goody” after you’ve made a huge issue of being married for 22 years after I mentioned after seeing it more than once that we’ve been married longer.I don’t beleive I’m the one with issues as it is you who keeps making a big deal out of what you did and what you have.*eyeroll* I’m not really into that I guess it comes with being frugal and not being all that impressed with people who feel the need to do that.
My comment about silly was about the whole princess thing some women seem to think is a huge deal. It wasn’t and never has been to me. I’ve always been very self assured of who I am and never felt that need. My comme, she is the one who interjected herself in what I said and made it personal to her.I’m very frugal and that stuff just has never impressed me.That’s all.Over the years I’ve been blessed to become friends with people most would never guess had a dime to their name but come to find out were what is known as “old money” so I guess I’ve picked that attitude up a bit and know that those who make a huge deal out of what they have usually don’t.
Why woulkd you say that? I did not make this about you,YOU made this about you.Knock it off. If you felt the need to be princess for the day that is your buisness I made a general comment and you made it about you?
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