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Cletus is passing by Billy Bob’s hay barn one day when, through a gap in the
door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an
old green John Deere.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first
the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his
shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall
down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing
both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt
underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and
hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says,”What the heck are you doing,
Billy Bob?”

“Jeez, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me,” says an obviously
embarrassed Billy Bob. “But me’n the Ol’ Lady been havin trouble lately in
the bedroom d’partment, and the therapist suggested I do ‘something sexy to
a tractor’.”

[Don’t make me come splain this you. Read the last line again slowly]

As I've been up all night writing, I'm going to bed now its 4 O'clock AM, so I'm posting breakfast now so you all don't get hungry before I wake up!

BREAKFAST

Breakfast Plate
Sunrise 2 Eggs with toast.
2 Eggs with bacon or sausage, and toast.
Grand Slam
2 Eggs with Bacon or sausage, potatoes or grits, and toast.

Breakfast Sandwiches
Eggwich
1 Egg with bacon or sausage, mayo and tomato on a kaiser roll.
Super Eggwich
2 Eggs with ham and cheese on a croissant.
Eggpita
3 Eggs with bacon or sausage, and cheese on a pita.
Johnn’s Eggpita
3 Eggs with gyro meat, onions, green peppers, Tomatoes, olives, and feta cheese on a pita.
Ham and Cheese Croissant

Omelets
Ham and Cheese
Bacon and Cheese
Sausage and Cheese
Western
3 Egg omelet with ham, green peppers, onions, and cheese.
Greek
3 Egg omelet with gyro meat, green peppers, onions, tomatoes, back olives, and feta cheese.
Vegetarian
3 Egg omelet with onions, green peppers, tomatoes, black olives, and cheddar cheese.
(All omelets are served with potatoes or grits and toast.)

Side Orders
Potatoes or Grits
Bacon or Sausage
English Muffin
Bagel with Cream Cheese
Large Muffin
Croissant
Cereal with milk

A View Out The Cyber Café Window

In the light of a new day, we awake to the glory of God.

The World's Smartest Dog?
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please."
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big guy opens it and yells at the dog.
The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What in the world are you doing? This dog's a genius!"

The owner responds, "Genius? I don't think so. It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!"