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To: Diana in Wisconsin
You can't do anything for him. The more you try to help, the worse it will be. He has to "hit his bottom" and suffer the consequences of his actions. It this means living on the street or, God forbid, dying of the disease, you must be strong and allow it to happen. If he reaches out for help in getting treatment then you can assist him in getting into a facility or to meetings, but under no circumstances should you come to his rescue.

I know this is hard advice and very painful to watch, but you are in a situation in which you must take care of yourself. Find a good Alanon group and get into the program. Get a sponsor and work the steps. You will find strength and support.

I feel for you and pray for you in this. I have seen this innumerable times and those who go to Alanon are able to live happy positive lives in spite of the pain and tragedy you are going through.

Don't fall into the trap of believing that he doesn't care about you (though you may be right and only you can judge the truth of it), he is in the throws of a nightmarish disease which kills 90% of those who have it. It's not that he doesn't love you, it is that he is consumed with his mental obsession and physical compulsion.

I have been where he is in the disease and the power of denial is unbelievable to those who aren't alcoholics/addicts, but that is not an excuse. Sadly AA/NA is for people who want to recover, not for people who need to recover.

Again, take care of yourself and the rest of your family and allow him to go his own way. May God bless and keep you and may you find His strength in you hour of need.

The Light of God surrounds us,
The Love of God enfolds us,
The Power of God protects us,
The Presence of God watches over us,
Wherever we are God is.
54 posted on 05/28/2010 6:59:25 AM PDT by Sudetenland (Slow to anger but terrible in vengence...such is the character of the American people.)
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To: Sudetenland

“Don’t fall into the trap of believing that he doesn’t care about you (though you may be right and only you can judge the truth of it), he is in the throws of a nightmarish disease which kills 90% of those who have it. It’s not that he doesn’t love you, it is that he is consumed with his mental obsession and physical compulsion.

I have been where he is in the disease and the power of denial is unbelievable to those who aren’t alcoholics/addicts, but that is not an excuse. Sadly AA/NA is for people who want to recover, not for people who need to recover.”

You are wise and you have good reason to be proud. All too many never make it back. -hat tip-


63 posted on 05/28/2010 9:07:39 AM PDT by Gator113 (OBAMA THAT IS NOT SUSTAINABLE..... IMPEACH Obama NOW..)
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