Somebody should tell him that global warming has been canceled, so he needs to run around in circles while on fire, but scream a slightly different tune.
Perhaps the vengeful ghost of Michael Jackson is causing tectonic stress, or the Tea Parties are throwing off the Earth's balance and are going to cause a polar shift...
Frowning takes 68 muscles.
Smiling takes 6.
Pulling this trigger takes 2.
I'm lazy.
