[jaycee]

Before we get off this fruitcake gig, I just had to mention something Johnny Carson said years ago. (I loved Johnny).
He said ‘there was only one fruitcake in the world and it got shipped to different people every year!’ Now, we know that can’t be but it was a funny bit back then! Johnny made everything funny with his facial expressions. He will always be one of our greatest comedians.

[jaycee]

[Lady Jag]

Reasons to NOT regift Fruitcake: Creative suggested uses and applications for fruitcake

• Wrap it in plastic, place in the toilet tank to conserve water when you flush
• Plug the rodent holes in your house
• Use a slice to shim up the leg of that wobbly table
• Chock the tires of your car, truck or trailer
• fnord
• Shim out the doorframe you're installing in your house
• Ballast for the keel of your boat
• Throw at police during violent protests instead of bricks, rocks, or molotov cocktails
• Build a retaining wall
• Sent to the military to use as practice ordinance
• Use instead of hay bales to back the targets during archery practice
• Alternative to cinder blocks for dorm shelving
• Ablative shielding for launch re-entry vehicles
• Cheap alternative to the expensive ordinance being used by our Military