The sad, sad state of college English

The Examiner ^ | 14 Nov 2008 | Michael Olesker

[Knitebane]

I bet those kids know how to put a condom on a banana though!

But not on anything else, judging by the teenage pregnancy rates.

[ichabod1]

I tend to use run-ons and leave out necessary commas when writing on this forum. I thought it had improved my writing, but when I started grad school I realized I had some habits that needed to be corrected. Sometimes I use fragments for effect, and intentionaly mis-spell words.

[ichabod1]

I NEVER jog on a woman’s ovaries.

[beefree]

nuff sayed

[Tax-chick]

“The children of lesbian couples receive as much neutering as those of other couples."

Oh, at least! Maybe more!

Verbal mayhem ping. Reading this sort of thing really boosts my self-a-steam.

[martin_fierro]

[DiogenesLaertius]

You are what you read, and Gen Y’ers do not read. They skim at best, and it reflects in their vapid personalities and political preferences.

[SpinnerWebb]

The response from one college student to the question"What is it with the youth of today? Ignorance, Indecision, or Apathy?"

"I don't know, and I'm not sure I care."

[lastchance]

Even in a warm climax?

[Tax-chick]

LOL! That’s new to me, but Bill said he’s seen it.

[Brucifer]

I've been an English teacher/professor for long enough. This is my last year. There's very little intellectual curiosity in academia anymore... unless you include professors with PhDs in fourteenth century Italian poetry writing papers to prove that George Bush and the Republicans have created global warming.

[don-o]

Your kidding.

[Titus Quinctius Cincinnatus]

I feal their pane. I hate grammer too.

[Titus Quinctius Cincinnatus]

These kids today are geniuses

[Augustinian monk]

“The children of lesbian couples receive as much neutering as those of other couples.”

They sure do, little Johnny, they sure do.

[BykrBayb]

Just a few days ago, a FReeper said New York City had a contractor murder an actress. I joked with her about the error, but she couldn’t understand. She became enraged over my lack of prior knowledge that NYC had gotten the contractor to commit murder. I was familiar with the case, and I think the construction worker acted on his own. I went to great lengths to explain it to her, but she only became more insistent. I don’t know if she couldn’t understand the meaning of her own words, or if she honestly believed the city got the contractor to commit murder. Either way, it became funnier by the day, as she argued her case.

[NathanR]

IT'S 5 cm YOU MORON!!

Not you martin, the original MORON.

[snicker]

[NathanR]

"I don't know, and I'm not sure I care."

In other words, all three.

[PhatHead]

I hate grammer too.

But he's a conservative!

[snarks_when_bored]

“My brother and I took a fairy across to Martha’s Vineyard."

Men violating the Mann Act?