It doesn’t take very many spankings for a child to learn that mom (or dad) means business when they speak. Two or three good swats gets their attention. A stern voice gets their attention. I had twins. I know it’s not easy. It’s just more “work” to make sure you are listened to and more “work” to follow up. It means more creativity. Some parents don’t like the idea that children take more work than they envisioned expending. More work even when you’re tired. When you have more than one small child at a time you really have to be stern and make sure they know you mean business at times - even if you have to go home, instead of finishing your shopping. My advice is, if you’re tired with one, if you can’t control one, don’t have another one! lol
“My advice is, if you’re tired with one, if you can’t control one, don’t have another one! lol”
I agree.
My husband and I always said, the first one was easy, lol even though it wasn’t all that easy. Then the second a year or so later, made it more difficult. We laugh about the 3rd, because, the first two had us now the 3rd was extra, extra hands, etc., whereas the first two had one of us solely focused. Then the 4th and that was tough, lol, lugging all 4 with only 2 adults. Or when one of us took all 4 out alone. However, it’s do-able with supervision.
The focus has to be on the kids all the time. And, we went home a few times.
I understand the leashes though. When I first saw them, I was appalled. My first thought was who the hell puts their kid on a lease? Then I saw that some need them and benefit from them.
My 2nd kid was a handful. Fortunately, the threatening worked. Then the 4th, oh boy. No problems shopping but tons of problems in the house. She learned early on how to work the locks on the doors and even the security system. I was in the backyard talking to my next door neighbor. My 3 kids were in her yard. Youngest was taking a nap (or so I thought). My Mom (before she died) was in the house. The kid got out of the house. A neighbor from across the street saw her and told me (hey your kid is on your front lawn). Anyway, we installed a window bar on her bedroom window, too. This kid could get through everything.
Just made us more diligent.
I’m ok with spankings. Never did it but ok with them. Tone of voice, facial expressions, grounding works for us.
“Some parents don’t like the idea that children take more work than they envisioned expending. More work even when you’re tired. When you have more than one small child at a time you really have to be stern and make sure they know you mean business at times - even if you have to go home, instead of finishing your shopping”
Exactly. And sometimes, parents just have to focus on the kids at all times. Far too many don’t.
Sometimes, even the best parents have kids who screw up. We have to let them go at some point. Certainly not when they’re toddlers or young adults/teens. But eventually they’re going to make their own decisions.
As for the leash thing, I still think whatever works for some parents. Never used one, thought the leash was odd, but it works for some.
Spanking worked with my older son, but it was a waste of time and effort with the younger son.
When you have a strong willed child spanking sometimes just intensifies the rebellion. And you run the risk of losing control yourself and not knowing when to stop.