Posted on 03/23/2007 6:33:05 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Unngh!!!
http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d61/choad12/untitled.jpg
good either
Where beeyotches grow.
Did you scroll all the way down??
The Rules for Chocolate
If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
Clearly, chocolate is a vegetable. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. A bean is a vegetable. Wait! There's more! Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar beets. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. QED: chocolate is a vegetable.
Chocolate-covered raisins, -cherries, -orange slices and -strawberries all count as fruit. Eat as many as you want. Fruits are an important part of the Food Pyramid.
Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off Your appetite and you'll eat less.
If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
Money talks. Chocolate sings.
Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Therefore, chocolate is therapeutic.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
CHOCOLATE SUCKS!
Yep. I was just giving it a different spin.
The Mods must not care for goiter pictures? ;)
Post #8 gone
Post #48 gone
Scratch that #8 and # 49
Personally, I prefer Lamborghini's to Fiats.
CHOCOLATE MATHEMATICS:
This is pretty neat how it works out. This is cool chocolate math!!!!!!!
DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!
It takes less than a minute. ... Work this out as you read. Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out! This is not one of those waste of time things. It's fun.
1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate. (try for more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (Just to be bold)
3. Add 5. (for Sunday)
4. Multiply it by 50. I'll wait while you get the calculator. …
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1752.... If you haven't, add 1751.
6. Now subtract the four-digit year that you were born. You should have a three-digit number. …
The first digit of your answer was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).
The next two numbers are…
YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it IS!!!!!)
THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2002) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS.
Travcar's notes about this magical number:
The numbers 1751 and 1752 would each have to be increased by 1 for each additional year past 2002. For example, use 1752 and 1753 for the year 2003.
For all of you disbelievers, here's a proof.
Let the number of times you have chocolate = x
Let the year you were born = y
1. x
2. 2x
3. 2x+5
4. 50(2x+5)
5. 50(2x+5) + 1752
6. 50(2x+5) + 1752 - y
With a little simple Algebra this equals
100x + 2002 - y
The 100x places the x in the first digit of your answer, for the number of times you have chocolate.
2002 - y, your year of birth, gives you your age!
I haven't had my chocolate yet, so duh....2002....s/b updated eh?
There is a new study just released by the American Psychiatric Association about women and how they feel about their asses. The results are pretty interesting:
1. 5% of women surveyed feel their ass is too big.
2. 10% of women surveyed feel their ass is too small.
3. The remaining 85% say they don't care; they love him; he's a good man, and they would have married him anyway.
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