Holy moly the roads are bad out there. The interstate was pure ice until about halfway through Olympia. Came close to rear-ending a guy on the hill just before the on-ramp...I stopped at the top of the hill, but then the van started sliding down the other side and brakes did absolutely nothing. Luckily he moved before I could bump him, and I wasn't moving beyond a crawl anyway, but even so...I'm definitely awake now.
At least it's warming up.
The good thing about icy weather fender benders is they happen reeeeeeeeaaallly slooooooooow.