Hmmmmm. What does that make a guy like me, who stands at the base of the tree with a long stick knocking the best apples at the top off and catching them as they fall?
Rebound guy. You wait until they're bruised a bit and go in for the kill.
You sound like a smart guy. The really really shiny apples don't like smart guys. That's OK, because they are way too tart and seem to rot really fast anyway.