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Man accused of hiding lobster in pants
The Courier Mail (Australia) ^ | February 15, 2006

Posted on 02/15/2006 12:22:27 PM PST by Shermy

THERE aren't too many people who could get away with hiding a whole lobster down the front of their pants.

Craig Simpson gave it a red hot go, but ended up in handcuffs in the Brisbane Magistrate's Court yesterday.

As well as the lobster, the 35-year-old from East Brisbane crammed 1kg of prawns down the front of his trousers at an inner-city supermarket on Monday.

He was charged with unauthorised dealing with shop goods after he was seen stuffing the crustaceans into his pants before walking out of the store without paying for them.

Prosecutor Sergeant Henri Rantala said police approached Simpson who told them if he had had bigger pockets, he would have stolen more.

Sgt Rantala asked that Simpson be ordered to repay the cost of the prawns and the lobster - neither of which could be returned to the store's shelves.

Simpson represented himself in court where he pleaded guilty to the charge.

Magistrate Jacqui Payne ordered Simpson to pay the supermarket $35 for the seafood, and fined him $250.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: cocklobster; happytoseeyou; lobster; ouch
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To: Xenalyte

Well freepmail ME the link so I can leer at the garter at least! Congrats!


101 posted on 02/15/2006 3:39:09 PM PST by LibertarianInExile (Freedom isn't free--no, there's a hefty f'in fee--and if you don't throw in your buck-o-5, who will?)
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To: Shermy

And there ya go!

102 posted on 02/15/2006 4:01:36 PM PST by Hi Heels (Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence?)
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To: pissant

Did you bring the butter? HUH? Did you? Well then.....


103 posted on 02/15/2006 4:03:15 PM PST by Hi Heels (Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence?)
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To: Hi Heels

Yes. And ignore the curly little hairs on your lobster. LOL


104 posted on 02/15/2006 4:06:04 PM PST by pissant
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To: LibertarianInExile

That is a bummer!


105 posted on 02/15/2006 4:18:17 PM PST by Rennes Templar ("The future ain't what it used to be".........Yogi Berra)
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To: Thinkin' Gal

Ebb-uh dint-ly...I wood unt no..fo sho...butt... I had some claws in my con-tracks!!! YO yO YO!"


106 posted on 02/15/2006 4:18:31 PM PST by DainBramage
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To: Thinkin' Gal

Ebb-uh dint-ly...I wood unt no..fo sho...butt... I had some claws in my con-tracks!!! YO yO YO!"


107 posted on 02/15/2006 4:18:32 PM PST by DainBramage
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To: birbear

Sorry, I was being shellfish.


108 posted on 02/15/2006 4:20:10 PM PST by Rennes Templar ("The future ain't what it used to be".........Yogi Berra)
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To: Constitution Day
This is wrong on so many levels...
109 posted on 02/15/2006 4:46:06 PM PST by Dr.Zoidberg (Mohammedism - Bringing you only the best of the 6th century for fourteen hundred years.)
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To: Larry Lucido; Xenalyte; Millie
Is that a lobster in your pants or are you just crabby to see me?

Nope - that's a shrimp.

110 posted on 02/15/2006 5:09:47 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (Happy Wednesday...)
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To: Rennes Templar; speedy; LibertarianInExile; Blurblogger; Joe 6-pack

My hands are clammy and my mussels are tense at the thought of this guy with a lobster in his pants......


111 posted on 02/15/2006 5:11:11 PM PST by hispanarepublicana (I'd rather go hunting with Dick Cheney than get in a car with Ted Kennedy...[props to Auto Power])
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To: tubebender; NormsRevenge; Pete-R-Bilt; B4Ranch; Eaker; humblegunner; Squantos

I can't believe you guys haven't pinged me to this...

112 posted on 02/15/2006 5:11:41 PM PST by glock rocks (Real engineers don't answer "why" questions.)
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To: glock rocks
I can't believe you guys haven't pinged me to this...

I thought it was about you...
I was keeping it close, it's not like you shot a lawyer or anything.

113 posted on 02/15/2006 5:23:25 PM PST by humblegunner (If you're gonna die, die with your boots on.)
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To: glock rocks; humblegunner; TheMom

He could have had lobster, prawns and a smoked mini-sausage!


114 posted on 02/15/2006 5:25:44 PM PST by Eaker (My Wife Rocks! - Islam is the cancer, the US Military and Militia is the answer!)
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To: Rennes Templar

I tell ya, some folks are just shellfish. He could have gone out in his own boat and gotten his own seafood, or he could even have just walked into the water and caught his own. A Roe vs Wade situation?


115 posted on 02/15/2006 5:27:17 PM PST by Chena (I'm not young enough to know everything.)
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To: Beckwith
Is that a lobster in your pants or are you just glad to see me?

Guess that store didn't carry any Cockles.

116 posted on 02/15/2006 5:28:31 PM PST by Chena (I'm not young enough to know everything.)
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To: Rennes Templar

I don't suppose this idiot was a Pollack?


117 posted on 02/15/2006 5:30:49 PM PST by Chena (I'm not young enough to know everything.)
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To: glock rocks

You're gonna love this...


118 posted on 02/15/2006 5:33:35 PM PST by tubebender (Everything I know about computers I learned on Free Republic...)
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To: ApplegateRanch
There was an old man who stuffed a fly in his pants. I don't know why he stuffed that fly! There was on an old man, who stuffed a spider in his pants; He stuffed the spider to eat the fly; I don't know why he stuffed the fly! ............ There was an old man wh stuffed a lobster in his pants. He stuffed the lobster to eat the eel .... ...to eat the spider...to eat the fly... Now he's been jailed as a mobster.

Sounds like squid pro quo.

119 posted on 02/15/2006 5:39:48 PM PST by Chena (I'm not young enough to know everything.)
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To: Chena

I dont know but he must have been cocksure that thing wasn't going to bite him!


120 posted on 02/15/2006 5:42:14 PM PST by Rennes Templar ("The future ain't what it used to be".........Yogi Berra)
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