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KODT further warns all of you to beware your electric toothbrushes. That's how the aliens get into your house. When you hear that little hum, that's them.

They are trying to steal our oceans. Their planet is running out of water. The moon is one of their satellites. You notice all of the big pock marks are only on one side, which is pretty good evidence that it got shoved here from someplace else. You notice that the ocean rises and falls based on the phases of the moon. Well, that's them. When they get the harmonics just right, the whole ocean will go *grotesque slurping sound* and they will take it away with them. Those global warming people don't know what to worry about.

Anyway, in their spare time, while they're waiting to get the harmonics right, they're invading. You know those houses that sit off the ground a little ways on cinder blocks? Well. That's where they live. Then they get into your house, usually through your pipes. And don't think you can stop them by putting that nasty foamy stuff around the pipes to close the gap where the pipes come through the floor. They eat that stuff and when they get fat enough, they reproduce.

p.s.----It's not paranoia if they really are out to get you.

Your Mom is Louis Farrikan?