Bad Girls vs. Good Girls

askmen.com ^ | matthew fitsgerald

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

There's an old joke that goes: Good girls say, "No;" bad girls ask, "When?"

And in that old 'joke' is buried a deceptive premise, a LIE, that goes to the heart of male-female relationships: that ALL males pressure Good Girls to say yes--and that such is to be expected, even from a Godly man. HARDLY. WWJD? A worthy man, I contend, also knows he must defend a woman from his own urges--and her from hers.

We're told in Scripture that the woman is a "weaker vessel." That's NOT a put-down--that's a call to honor and defend. The male who is willing to bed a willing girl outside of marriage shows that his most profound DEFAULT is short-term gratification. His default YES puts the woman in charge of crucial aspects of the relationship. From my experience--few women truly want that; IIRC, it is James Dobson who refers to this creating a woman's distrust in a man's leadership.

Yes, I advocate and (sigh, at times reluctantly) am practicing virginity until marriage. I believe that's the way a man shows a woman respect--and shows himself respectable. I willingly trade short-term gratification for the benefits of abstinence, which include zero risk of communicable diseases, abortion/paternity/child support issues etc.

If a Song of Solomonic pun can be permitted, Virgins Unite! As God told Elisha in the cave after the victory over Jezebel's 400 prophets of Baal, "seven thousand haven't bent the knee." So I keep on looking for her, I know she's out there....

[pissant]

Whoa Nelly

[cyborg]

Agreed.

[cyborg]

To think I used to believe there were no guys who were virgins, wanted chaste girls for girlfriends,etc.etc.etc.

[HitmanLV]

Just as the 'nice guy/jerk' paradigm is needlessly limiting (as well as false) for many men, the 'madonna/whore' paradigm is needlessly limiting (as well as false) for women.

In both cases they tend to be used as excuses for underperformance, failure, or poor life-circumstance.

It's easier for men to say 'women don't like nice guys, they want jerks' and let themselves get consistently turned down.

It's easier for women to say 'men don't like good girls, they like sluts' and let themselves get consistently turned down.

In each case, the complainers add energy and life to the paradigm, and even though it isn't a legit way of looking at things, they breathe life into it to explain their situation (usually an unsatisfactory situation).

Each paradigm is silly - it is only true to the extent that a person buys into it. Indeed, whenever I read any kind of extended thoughts on these paradigms, I figure the person writing it has a very immature view of things.

And usually, I'm right.

[pissant]

I think there are quite a few guys who would like to marry virgins. However, they sabotage the deal because in their twenties they expend alot of effort to depopulate that group. ;0}

[pissant]

Maybe that's why we like you so much here, we're cavemen!

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

"Whoa Nelly"

It's Whoa Blurblogger to you! LOL

[missyme]

Maybe Men and Women are like Food everybody wants Chocolate Cake- Because it looks good tastes good makes you feel good but eat enough of it well then bad results happen.

But if you try say Tofu well it's boring tastes boring doesn't look all that good but the end result it's positive...

[pissant]

That's funny!

[cyborg]

I think it's incredibly hypocritical that men who aren't virgins demand girls be as such. Who were they sleeping with in college but someone's future wife.

[cyborg]

LOL

[missyme]

LOL..Just don't call me Wilma....

[pissant]

Missyme,
I think you just qualified for Laura Ingraham's "deep thought of the day". ;o}

[cyborg]

bump!

[pissant]

Hypocrits? Men? It can't be! ;o}

[cyborg]

Yeah I know *lol*

[missyme]

I have a feeling most around here want Chocolate Cake anyways...Haha

[pissant]

I always liked Betty better (short hair & all...)

[Badray]

Now you did it.

There are more 'Donnas' than 'Madonnas.'