Posted on 11/19/2004 6:32:14 AM PST by grellis
Since we have several new moms and dads at the table (remember--you are a new parent to each of your children!), I thought it might be nice if we helped them sift through the barrage of advice they are now facing. What is the best advice, with regard to becoming a parent, that you have ever heard? The worst? Most ridiculous? Most dangerous?
Now that is funny!!
This Mom would like to be added to the ping list, please!
=0)
Father of four wisdom coming up.
Don't whisper when they're sleeping. We once pounded a nail and hung a picture over our daughter when she was sleeping.
Don't spare the rod. The judicious use of pain works wonders on bad attitudes.
Be the mom and dad, not the best friend.
Talk like an adult, not coo-coo baby talk.
Their heads are soft for a reason. Don't panic when they fall.
Childhood injuries will occur. If you laugh them off, so will they.
Laugh with them. Encourage them and don't be afraid to let them fall down and fail once in a while.
Thank you!! I think we'll keep him!! LOL!!
Amen for Daddy time! DH plays with Evie when he gets home from work, so I can make dinner. He helps me get her ready for bed, and she falls asleep around 8:30. Then we spend some time catching up with each other. A strong relationship between parents is so important for a healty family overall.
For me, the "secret" is trial and error. Mostly error! Even with the 7th baby, some days I would have him in the sling so he was secure and comfortable, and some days I wouldn't.
When they get older, keep them busy with sports and other activities to limit bad influences.
Small children should be kept away from TV since considerable amount of research indicates it has an impact on brain developement (apart from the content issue), especially shows where there is a lot of movement and shift of scenes, and promotes weight gain.
Excellent advice ... and so is Cub Scouts!
No, please...not the sling!
Seriously, the sling is a tool of Satan. It is too easy to become so attached to the child due to 24/7 slinging that is impossible to release the child as they grow.
I know someone who still wore the sling well after the child was walking. She even had a large teddy bear in the sling. It is seriously unhealthy to depend on that.
Oh, pish-tosh. You don't need to dismiss a useful parenting tool (ever tried to take five kids six-and-under anywhere?) just because some people are noodles. It's like saying we should all give up our guns because some people shoot themselves.
Amen to that! I don't care what anybody says, children need naps and regular bedtimes. A well rested child is so much nicer to be around. Arrange your schedule around nap time
I would add to that:
Be fair but consistent. If you are appeasing, cajoling and reasoning with a 4 year old it is already too late.
Children are NOT small adults
and the absolutely worst advice I've ever gotten is you will spoil your baby by holding them too much. Poppycock! Can you imagine applying that logic to your spouse? I'm sorry dear, I'd like to console you but I don't want you to become too emotionally dependent on me...
A funny bedtime story. My husband used to come home from work and tease the boys. "How's that job thing going? Did you get out today and look for a job?" Stuff like that. One night our 2 1/2 YO youngest son was battling us because he didn't want to go to bed yet. We would carry him up to bed, he would come down. This happened 3 times and then my husband calmly told him if he comes down again he was going to get a spanking.It is bedtime. Period. You ARE going to bed. 2 minutes later we could hear him get out of bed and sit down in the upstairs hallway and he yells down, "I'm NOT going to bed and I'm NOT getting a job!" I guess he realized we weren't gonna give in cause he got up and went to bed. So I would add to the list:
Be more stubborn than your kids!
Wow--in honor of my birthday!!!
JK--I actually do get it!
I'm surviving, I think the hormones are getting pretty balanced already. Thank goodness! My main worry is for my 15 month old. I feel so guilty because I don't hold him as much anymore. I swear in the first week that he would look at me in a totally hurt way. His look said "Who are are you holding and why isn't it me?" I do make special time for us and I hope it is enough. It is hard because my oldest is only 3 years and 3 months, so all my kids are pretty young. He is a big help to me and loves his baby sister. The hardest part for him is remembering to add his sister's name to his prayers. I'll look up the info you sent, thanks!
Oh, he's just adorable! All that dark hair! Congrats and enjoy!
Don't be quiet when the kids sleep - then they HAVE to have quiet to sleep. Vacuum, watch TV, whatever when they sleep and you can actually get things done at their naptime.
Pish-Tosh? That's a hugh new word. Never heard it before.
With 4 kids, we took them everywhere without a sling. My concern is that too many that I've heard of get too attached to it.
BTW, Cubs are pretty cool. We have 50 Scouts in a homeschool pack. Last night, during our den meeting, I had a friend do a little home invasion. Stole a couple of things and ran away, leaving behind some clues. We did fingerprints and shoeprint casts and solved the crime.
After years of the "life is not fair" spiel, our standard reply is now "....because we like him better". They roll their eyes, shake their heads and laugh.
Quilla, I wish I had some sagely advice... I was the fifth of six and one of my parents was always waiting up for me when I was a teen.
I was, however, a scandalously dangerous driver.
Let me know if you want to be added to the ping!
Let them make their own decisions. They will learn from making mistakes.
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