I was a big proponent of 38 snubbed nosed until I found some women have difficulty with the trigger pull weight and length on some hammerless revolvers.
I guess women are pickier. Before you buy one for her have her get the feel. A compact or a sub compact is a perfect purse or glovebox gun.
My wife really likes the Glocks and with their safeties she can keep one in the pipe.
Just a little confused by your statement. For self defense you would always want one in the pipe (no time to rack slide in most cases), but the Glock only has the safe trigger, so you do have to handle appropriately. Recommend not in a pocket or purse, but rather a hard holster with trigger and guard completely covered. What other safeties were you referring too?