Posted on 01/09/2015 10:08:31 AM PST by grundle
I blinked at my computer screen. It was a response to an email I had sent to a friend telling her I was 12 weeks pregnant and that the father was someone I had met during my summer abroad. He didnt know I was pregnant and I had no plans to tell him.
I had expected surprise or at the very least, Congratulations! but her response made me briefly wonder whether I was setting myself and my baby up for a lifetime of second guessing.
Still, 10 weeks later, now that Ive found out Im having a daughter, my position is clear, if controversial: Despite the unfairness and complications, I will not tell this man that he has a child.
I met Nick at a bar one Thursday night in Dublin, where I lived for several months while working on a writing project. I had gotten used to exploring my new city alone and meeting whoever came along. After a few vodka sodas, I invited Nick back to my apartment. The truth is, I didnt want to talk to him anymore. He and I disagreed about almost everything. Still, the physical connection was palpable.
We had sex, and in the moment, neither of us were as careful as we should have been. As we said goodbye, we had an awkward conversation. And youre okay? He asked tentatively, clearly referring to birth control.
I nodded. I wasnt, exactly my birth control prescription had run out a few months before and, because I was abroad, I hadnt gotten a new one.
(Excerpt) Read more at yahoo.com ...
My step-grandson fits this thread almost perfectly, but he has not grown up damaged. He is eleven and one of the lights of my life. we have never given him any cause to believe he is ‘damaged’. But there are many other parameters to the love we have freely given, such as the financial support for him and his life-affirming mother.
Indeed. She needs to quickly get her act together before the child permanently suffers the consequences of the mother’s lack of morals.
A child is not an error.
But .. why wouldn’t you take an extra supply. She ran out of her prescription BEFORE SHE WENT ON THE TRIP .. and she was expecting she wouldn’t be attracted to anyone ..??
Ignorance!
Women are total b$tches. How do you men stand some of us? What a horrible thing to do.
Now, if she had said the guy was evil or dangerous, fine. But hey, she is a continent away, and she doesn’t even have to allow him to see her. She could give him an anonymous email address and tell the father, let’s keep a communication open until I feel you are a safe decent human being. He can’t blame her for that. Then, if he proves himself to her, she can let him into her child’s life.
Exactly. If she didnt want the man in her life, she shouldnt have allowed him into her body.
Don’t have sex with anyone you don’t want to raise a child with. Period. Condoms break and the pill doesn’t always work.
“Not a chance a pig like Nick was going to be a father anyways.” That may not be true. Although I agree that Nick is objectively not a good bet, I have known many people who do not grow up until they HAVE to. Many or most young adults today have no sexual morals but have good hearts. If given a chance, perhaps Nick would rise to the occasion. I’ve known happy marriages that had weird or rocky starts, as well as marriages that seemed destined to flourish, yet failed. Even losers like Nick deserve a chance, and their offspring deserve a chance to have fathers. Alas, this woman won’t give them such a chance.
Until such time that she needs money to support him. Then she will DEMAND it.
Amen to that, Yaelle!
There have been a number of women in my life who decided they didn’t want to talk to me anymore.
Hard to believe, I realize.
Not one of them offered to take me home for sex.
Applies to men too.
Or should if they’re decent human beings.
I had the same experience. What is with her, saying she doesn’t want to talk to him, apparently doesn’t like him, yet takes him home to her bedroom. Something strange is going on in her head.
A little late to ask about STDs AFTER having sex with her.
Of course, if they had offered my wife would have been really pissed off.
i thought she said “mick”...
that’s racist gif in 3, 2, 1...
It makes me wonder if all children born should be tested to determine paternity. It would at the least keep men from being stuck supporting children that are not theirs.
Someone should post this on all the Dublin social networks.
“Imagine my shock when I found out that you could get pregnant from sex. That’s not what I wanted”.
Science is so anti-women
I think “twit” is misspelled. Accurate, but misspelled.
I read it, You are correct, actually I think what she is doing is Criminal.
Her most loving, unselfish option would be to put the baby up for adoption.
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