“That hesitation spoke volumes, the excuse a library.”
You explained it very well. The hesitation was so long, my brain was thinking, “Why isn’t he talking?” I did not expect him to say, “I might get in trouble if I shot.” In my head I thought, “He is a wimp and she is dead.” I didn’t say anything as it wouldn’t have changed his mind, he made his decision when he hesitated so long.
My handguns are to use in a life threatening situation and if I have to have one in my hand for that reason, I will damn sure use it - without hesitation.
For me, it was all hypothetical until I had to draw down on someone coming in the place I was living. Had it been the person who was the threat, a small movement and a squeeze would have finished it.
From there, it was a matter of rolling the revolver back in my hand, letting the hammer down and admonishing the person for the way they entered, especially since they knew the situation.
When I got my concealed carry permit, years later, the standard was simple.
It only comes out when there is a threat, and then to be used. Period.
I even bought a S&W Ladysmith hammerless (Model 642) because it would be reliable to shoot out of a parka pocket without having to draw it. You can get a new coat. (After I got Mrs. Joe one to carry in her coat pocket or purse--it may only be a .38, but I liked it that much.)
I can't fathom someone more worried about getting into trouble than defending their spouse, but then, an old Sheriff told me once when discussing a threat, "If the threat is real, do what you need to do. Just make sure you are the one who fills out the paperwork."